Stories at sahur, part 1

At least one complaint was lodged against me for not updating my blog. Puasa, folks.Tidak ada upaya to write! :))

I had to use my old Dior glasses yesterday cos' the one I usually wear tercabut screwnya.Maka tertanggal cerminnya.Thank God I still keep old glasses.Kalau tidak, another lack of insight, another poor judgment.Insights and sound judgments have loads to do with clear vision, methinks.

Sometimes we are tested so much that we tend to lose sight of the lessons Allah wants us to learn.I got this insight from a friend who is a non-Muslim but often talks about lessons to be learnt out of experiences we have.Good or bad.

This brings me to a story told by Z, returning from her ibadah camp in Bangi (as part of her preps to live overseas, by grace of Allah)

It came from one of the ustaz who went to study in Jordan in the early '90s.During his final year exam, he got locked in his home,missing his last two papers which he could only sit the following year.Then a series of mishaps happened to him..one after another..that I thought he just made up for dramatic effect, like an unfinished short story in which the editor would insist on adding more and more till he gets the right length or right drama.

The mishaps include the study fee increased 7 times more the year he returned for his exam..so he collected signatures to appeal to the authorities in Jordan and was accused of menghasut pelajar2 and his scholarship was suspended for 7 months, leaving him with much financial difficulty.So he went to London to work as a dishwasher to make money to pay for his study fee...then the British authorities found out his visa ran out just as he was leaving the UK.He was jailed for two weeks before deported back to Malaysia.His brother gave him some money later on so he could return and finish off his studies.

I think the tests didn't stop there.He met with an accident, had bad buasir, this that (I lost count!) and finally...8 years afterwards, got to sit for his last two papers.The lecturer who found out about why it took him so long to finish up his degree gave him an amanat...that he'd use his knowledge to remind others of the beauty of Islam.

So he became a daie..tried to be a fulltime lecturer..every time he enrolled in a postgrad studies, something would happen.In the end, he got the message..Allah wants him to stay a daie (he is also a successful businessman now)

Touching,isn't it? Sometimes it would take time for us to get it right.To get the lesson that God wants us to see.But whatever it is, it should take us back to Him.

Sekian, tazkirah Ramadhon kita kali ini.Wabillahi taufiq walhidayah,wassalamualaikum. :)

Ramadan Kareem

As salam,

Here's wishing everyone here Ramadan Kareem! May we do more this year to make up for lost years.

Eat less, pray more. :)

Sunday with Tariq Ramadan

comel

a bigot blogger in Vienna described him as the smiling terrorist (horrible labelling!)

After Nasi Padang lunch at Lina's, we went to listen to Tariq Ramadan's talk at ISTAC.The announcement was for 2 pm but he arrived almost an hour later.

He has aged, this man.But the fire and passion are still there when he speaks on certain issues.Much of what he believes in with regard to the arab spring or as he sees it - arab awakening,is similar to wht I think is happening too.That it didn't come outa vacuum, it would have taken time to plan, lots of financial support from here and there and that it wasn't just one group involved but many..wanting a share of control, etc.Yang funny was the first question from a rep of Perkasa...he wanted to say street demos are not Islamic and asked if there would be a spring in Msia too.Tariq kata how would he know...and said he knew the guy was hoping..haha..wrong...the guy is trying to stop it from happening..street demos not our culchah (culture).Soalan pertama selalu kelabu asap..:))

The Q&A spoke of more uprisings in MENA...now, that's really interesting to know.I must read up more lah on this.

Back on the road

Looks like my old routine is back.I have started reading poems again,thanks to Raja Ahmad's invitation to join his literary circle at his gallery at Dutamas.With the young ones.Ohh..they are very young and promising writers.A joy to meet them.Some with very bold voices who wrote of their or their personas' sexual tensions and desires.Raja and his lawyer friend,Razak and I a bit squeamish gamaknya.Ahaks.

I read 4 of my old pieces...2 in Malay, 2 in English.The young woman who sat next to me kata best...(I asked for her feedback..okay tak my reading?).Always ask for feedback so that you'd know wht work/not work.And that should give you some indications whether you should continue writing and reading poems. Kalau setakat syok sendiri, baik focus on blogging.Haha.

Many were held up by the police road block due to the march at the istana.Stopped to ask a policeman how else I could get to dutamas since semua jalan bapak mereka ditutup.One kind policeman advised me to go through Jalan Segambut.Tak sampai 5 mins dah sampai.Grin.A naughty sms said I hope you won't be the only one at the function.Kah3.Well, we had 20 people.Not bad lah,kan?

My Arabic class ended today.I hope I'd get the opportunity to polish up more after my big project's done next year.I intend to do my sabbatical in one of the countries in the Middle East.Mudah2an Allah perkenankan.Saudi, folks, Saudi. Madinah to be precise.

Z's generation

Z is home till Sept.I repeat: Z is home till Sept.

Please be prepared to read lots of Z's stories till then cos' I admit: I don't have a life.Haha.

You know that's not true but Z is such a good storyteller and I find stories of her friends worth sharing cos' the young minds would inspire us,the oldies.

By the way,she got the McKinsey internship thingy.It was pretty competitive to get in but alhamdulillah, she'll get some experience working with the best in the multinational org.Am proud of you gal.

But Z spoke of another brilliant friend (again, of mixed parentage) who won a scholarship to study in Hong Kong before going to the US to study in one of the ivy unis there.Let's call this bright and pretty gal Annie.She's a true genius cos' despite being surrounded by atheist and friends as well as teachers who mock religions and laugh at any show of religiosity,she came back every winter and summer break to learn more of Islam to strengthen and affirm her faith.Her family isn't particularly religious (but decent people) and I find Annie's decision to educate herself more of her religion truly touching.She went out of her way and enrolled in a course at IIUM..by herself! Wough..she has a clear direction of what she wants and needs,yah?Am deeply impressed cos' I also know of other kids her age who are easily influenced and sold their soul cos' of peer pressure and environs.Annie,may Allah give you strength to stay strong and wise (she does not wear tudung but it's obvious she takes great care of her iman and Z says Annie's constant prayer is she'd marry a good Muslim man to guide her.And this tall gal is very,very pretty,OK? Like a model.Her hair a bit blondish..naturally so)

Z has a seminar tomorrow ( on what ..I have lost track!) but watch this space to hear her stories when she returns.:)

Intellectual picnic by the lake

Keynote speaker, Prof Vijay Bhatia

me, Prof Wan and Dr Arbaayah

Prof Sabariah, Prof Bhatia and yours truly

the hall where I spoke

Today marks the end of MICOLLAC's 2-day conference.Dr.Rosli Talif was the one who founded the conference..now into its 7th year.Fantastic,isn't it?

I sat through some interesting lit. papers by young academics and pgrads.We had nice discussions on racial divides etc.Oh met Dr. Ida and got into Anthony Burgess' discussions...Zul was there too and the three of us had a bit of a laugh over Burgess' time in Malaya.

Mlm tu we had a barbecue at the Village.A long day.Beeped Jerry to get him to help out with my powerpoint materials while I keluar bersukaria.Thank you Jay for a job well-done.

My plenary session went ok.I terkantoi when a participant from Canada asked me why did I feature only male leaders in my presentation.Kah3.Then Rosli as my moderator HAD to rub it in by repeating the question...cheh cheh cheh.:))

But I had real nice questions during the Q&A.Prof. Bhatia and a few others said they too enjoyed the session.Baiklah Prof B ni.Kita berdua dok sok sek psl yg sorang tu yang tak pernah consistent dalam arguments nya.

Looks like ada ikatan kasih antara UPM and IIUM now.Congrats to Assoc. Prof. Wan Roselezam, Dr Sabariah and team.I enjoyed knowing all of you.Hope to do some research collaborations with you guys soon.

Footnote:All my 6 copies book of poetry were sold out at the conference.Alhamdullilah.Should have brought more.

UPM conference

I checked in at Pullman, Putrajaya late yesterday afternoon.This hotel and resort looks beautiful in the evening although the room I'm in is a wee bit odd (it has no writing desk..I have to do my work at the TV cabinet.I was told the place was built as a museum or a few museums to be exact but Putrajaya being Putrajaya...the place didn't have many visitors and ran a loss so some smart people bought it and converted it into a hotel..so spacious and exotic!)

We had dinner by the lake (at a restaurant called The Village.Like 10 times).Food was good.
At breakfast today, met Prof Vijay Bhatia (conference keynote, based in Hong Kong for the last 20 years or so) and had a very, very nice chat over breakfast.He's the Father of Genre Analysis and I learned more of GA at his workshop today.Mine went after his, after morning tea.I had to convert my intended lecture mode to Socrates style of learning (let the participants talk..with me in the b/ground asking questions and occasionally throwing in my responses to issues raised).What a wise last min decision! :)) A lot more inputs and a lot more inclusive that way.Thumbs up for Iranian/Gaza/Egyptian/Msian/Thai intelligent inputs.Ahh..enjoyed the discussions.Prof Bhatia's presence and input also added colour to what would have been a dull session had I not changed my modus operandi.Ahaks.

Fred's (from Finland) session was also interesting but I wish he had time for Q&A cos' I was a bit disturbed by his submission over dropping culture from any reference to or of multiculturalism.He said it's erroneous to say we meet culture when we actually meet people (hence, to treat people as individuals?... 16th century, isn't it? Very dangerous methinks..for this part of the world.It may work in Europe..to be culture-less is to be equal?) But imagine in this part of the world, what are we or who are we without culture (which would also include religion, I would argue). And he submitted that there's no such thing as a clash of civilisations..only clash of people.That's quite a nice argument but to advocate for individualism throughout...mmm...tak minat.Besok nak provoke dia sikit lagi.

I think Day 1 went well so congrats to Prof Wan and team.And to Dr. Daniel who picked us up in his brand new Mercz...thank you!
To Dr Arbaayah..nice touching base again.Hope to work on that book project soon.

Goodbye,Teja

Well folks, finally I found the courage to bid farewell to Teja.

When I took Teja for her usual injection, I asked Dr.Bilqis if there were anyone who'd like to take care of Teja.I no longer have the heart to hold her captive in her small cage.Nak lepas, takut hilang lagi.

Dr. Bilqis said Rafiq would not mind.Rafiq gave me an ear to ear grin.He's an Indonesian worker at the vet's and lives in Kg Jawa,Shah Alam.He's good with animals.He passed my interview,"Awak suka makan arnab?"

He laughed and said saya tak sanggup,Puan.

OK, passed!

So I took the last few pics of Teja which Dr. Bilqis kata is a male!Patutlah gatal sgt dok run after Tanjung and Tuah.We thot she was a lesbo!

I made a couple of calls to Z and Nik.Z was sedih.Nik supported my decision although a fortnight ago, he said not to give it away..for the joy it brought to us.But I think we all agreed Teja should not be kept captive.Bukan naluri arnab tidak melompat2.

Goodbye Teja.Thank you for all the love given to us all this time. Thank you for returning everytime your gps didn't work.Gonna miss you but you deserve a better life, a bigger space which Rafiq claims he has in Kg Jawa.

Rawa-land

Half of the clan are flying to Sumatera tomorrow.Queen Mother included (how she kissed and hugged me like it's me going just now...haha).There's so much excitement in their pre-departure.I'm a bit envious..I am not able to join mainly cos' of the conference in which I am one of the plenary speakers (in other parts of the world, that's keynote speaker for day 2 or 3, haha. Thanks UPM for that vote of confidence.I have always enjoyed speaking at your uni..this time it's at Pullman as well, yah)

Back to Queen Mother and her duckies.It's their first pilgrimage to their homeland..former Rawa kingdom.I just hope that they will not be sold by the guide, travelling from KL to where is it they are going...? Padang? I'm sure Mek and Sal will have heaps of fun stories.Mek is already funny sharing with us on how my mother bawak barang2 mcm nak balik kampong...bekal dia macam2..sambal belimbing..sambal jerok limau..berkotak2 instant noodles and tidak ketinggalan, her winter coat! Haha....we thought that was so cute.Padang is not England, Mom (she came to visit me in the UK in the 90s and had travelled to Egypt and Saudi quite a bit.Each trip she'd bring her wintercoat) This is her first trip abroad after years of being in and out hospitals in the last 4 years.A miracle, huh? Alhamdulillah.

Well, I'm glad Sal and family are having a break as well.She takes care of my mom a lot more than any of us put together.I wish them well.Tak sabar nak dengar cerita kelakar mereka (or horror stories of marble headed Rawa women travelling together!)

Watch this space in a few days.

The water monkey and I

Z is home till her A level exam results are out..you are looking at a couple of months bickering for iPad, air time, undivided attention just for her, etc.Water monkeys and tigers do not usually get on that well but separated, they miss each other a lot! :)

I see her time till August is almost full...with conferences, workshops, more internship interviews...another interview at petronas tower level 57.Interview junkie ke hapa budak ni.But Momma is proud,ok gal? Wish you all the best.Remember the slogan: it's OK to fail. haha.

I made time to listen to her endless stories about her friends.A fine lady was trying to impress a fine young man.At a function at this fine young man's home, the musicians were playing mozart..the boy told the gal..ahhh...i love classical music..Gal said: me too.Boy:Did you enjoy that wonderful piece by Mozart? Gal: ha? yah yah..that was fabulous (her cousin gave her an aside: you knew it was Mozart??)

I find this sooo cute.

Then there's another interesting friend..half French, half Malay. There was a family tradition in which gifts were given if a child lost a tooth (the tooth must be placed under the pillow).The French mom had not continued this tradition with the older kids but with a younger one, she did recently.The little one was pleasantly surprised.She thought it was the mouse that gave it to her.In her next trip to the dentist, she pleaded that all her teeth were taken out!

She lost another one but mom forgot to put the gift that nite.The little one was convinced when her mom told her the mouse got stuck in a traffic jam.Guling2.

The next morning, the little one asked if the mouse could get her a gift from The Girls.Mak dia dah beli pencil case NOT from The Girls.She said er...the mouse would not know where to buy The Girls' stuffs.

For parents with young children: does not this remind you of the moments when you have to lie a bit to make the little ones happy/motivated,etc? I had my moment or two too when Z was growing up.Well at least one lie..to make her lose her weight at 12.We told her she'd get her mobile phone.She lost a lot but only got her mobile ph at 17...5 years later.We didn't want her to bergayut too early.

Better late than never. :)

Happy 236th anniversary Uncle Sam

I got invited to the US Embassy's Independence Day celebration held at Marriott today...on my capacity as FAAM exec. I got to bring my spouse (who came late from work).

Pretty exciting cos' there were people I knew..Cathie Mulker of NZ High Comm..hug..hug..Chew from the US Embassy..then met new friends...the Ambassador of Afghanistan, spotted with Wahabudeen who just found out abt our blood ties..haha..janji nak balik kg bersama.And met up with someone from Kazakhstan and I learnt a bit more of the country.The country population is only 17 million,folks and so rich. Literacy rate is very high and they are inviting investors to do biz there mainly agriculture at the moment.Lots of land.Hope to visit one day.I have already an appointment to discuss possibilities (of other areas).Heh, the power of networking.

I also bumped into Sharifah's sis in law.And Khalid (now a CEO of an org while I guess still practising law ) and his friend from the Prime Minister's Office.I also got connected with this iron lady, a gutsy Dato from Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC) and we spoke of the spread of corruptions at all levels in the country.Universities included! Will invite her to speak to the kids at uni.They have to learn early that the hands that receive (bribes) and those which give are equally sinful and criminal.

The spread was good, folks.Authentically American.I loved the beef roast.Sedap giler.But I had churros and hot chocs just before the event so didn't eat that much.However, sempat juga merasa turkeynya.

Pics later.

To all my American friends...wherever you are...happy Independence Day...please get your government to leave Afghanistan, Iraq and support world peace in non-military ways.Congrats once again!

Here we go again

Saturday morning started with KL Hilton and ended with a lunch at Chynna,entertaining Prof. Alan Lew and his lovely wife. Z was with me.We had a nice time.Rugi you tak join with your wife, Dr. Bubbles.Even the green tea was nice.:)) Billnya pun nice juga.Haha..but never da mind. Alhamdulillah, we got da monehhh. :)

The talk on Speaking Tourism:Language, heritage and identity in Sabah did not attract much crowd.Miscommunication with KL Library..they only did the announcement after I asked them.Strange for a lib! Nak kena suruh ke? But those who came were interesting personalities with curious minds.I have to thank Dr. Bubbles who came to support.Not only that, he contributed to a lively discussion after the talk on his team's work addressing some issues on Sabahan street kids.Owh..so inspiring.

At lunch, Z and I got to know the Lews better, talking about growing up kids and the empty nest syndromme.Z and I had a nice time going through the day's event and her Spore trip experience while driving her to her spa.

By the time I got home, I was too tired to drive bck to Gombak to attend the workshop.So lepak with Nik till it was time to attend Dr. Aziz Bari's son's wedding in Taman Melewar.Hensem anak dia ni.He works in the US, I was told.Saw many PAS leaders there.We came late.Maybe thre were more before or after we left but met the gang and opened table to analyse local politics.Kah3.Told them, my struggle is bigger than my ego..this on why I agreed to the headship of cerdas (the directorship is reduced to headship as cerdas is brought back to kulliyyah) I need to see the end of projects I started.After that, I can move on to other things, OK? This morning, my new Dean rang to say he wanted me as one of the Deputy Deans but I told him the same thing I'm telling you here.I chose to stay at cerdas cos' of the on-going projects.Otherwise I would have said no to it as well.He respected that. :) For me, it has never been about positions but space and freedom to do what I believe in. I hope the new structure would not change that too much.

Have a good Sunday, folks.

30,000 voters and more

Prof. Farid,Prof Ainul and I were ASA reps to the high tea with PM Najib at Sri Perdana.No one else wanted to go..possibly due to another compulsory event on campus..the Quality Day.Managed to drop by and caught up with some news with some friends I had not seen for some time.

I thought the memorandum sent by MAAC was fair.But the question that shook the hall..at least my table..was a grp of women asking Najib to be seconded to KPT since he did well with the Women's Ministry ..what a slap to Khalid!! Wough..thot I was surrounded by fan holders...Prof. Che Husna sitting next to me was cool on her ph., texting her Boss.Haha.

Najib ni pandai juga buat lawak.In his stress on the need to close gap between the rich and poor in the country, he highlighted some poor places which would be so ulu tht it would be a wonder to get successful kids out of these places.Kg Bantal in Jerantut was cited as an example.He said..entah iya ke tak...the kg was named bantal cos' people who finally got thr would fall asleep immediately if disorongkan bantal due to the long and tiring journey.Kah3x.

I thought Sarawak lagi terok.Just then as though he read my mind..he said in Sarawak, there's this plc which I have to pronounce carefully..Kg Ulu Lachau..which is so remote bla bla bla.We have a funny PM,folks.But that is all there is.:))

Farid asked me, apakah achievement kita with this trip? I said kita dapat bergambar dgn Rosmah (gambar Rosmah on the wall).

Let's hope Najib kasi kita satu senator if his gomen is re-elected.Profs jeles Jins Shamsudin dan artis2 je dpt jadi senator...

Talk on Saturday

Looks like I'll miss another class of Arabic and my early session on screenwriting on Saturday.

Prof Alan Lew (Arizona, USA) will deliver a talk on "Speaking Tourism: Language, Heritage and Identity in Sabah" at 10 am at Lincoln Corner, KL Library.

And guess who I got in touch with after all these years? Yulduz! She's the Press Sect of Yen Yen at Ministry of Tourism.Wough..it's been a longgggg time but she's sweet as ever..promised me to extend the invitation to staff at the Ministry.Like me, she loves the academe.After GE (she wants to step down, she says), we'll meet more often, I hope.Yulduz (Taiwanese of Central Asian origins, married a Malaysian Chinese Muslim and by now is a citizen I'm sure) and I were both PhD students in the early 90s..she was finishing hers at MU, I was starting mine at Adelaide.We shared a common interest: Msian women's writing..she was doing a comparative study between Malay and Chinese Msian women writers.I was doing the Anglophone ones.Happy dayslah. :)

What do I do without my gfs?? Azah is the funniest.Saniah, the Pavlov jokes are truly funny.Love you gals.

Simply Tuesday

It could have been just another Tuesday on a summer's day.Or any Tuesday in Winter.I got both.

Ted arrived from Melbourne last nite,calling me late in the evening.I got him mixed up with Bas...haha..it was so hilarious..me asking him over the phone if he wanted to dine somewhere different from Sean's Royal Commonwealth House since they had been dining there every evening.

"And do you think Sean might want to join us?"I asked "Bas"

Bas asked me in return, Sean? I know no Sean..

Aren't you Sebastian?

No..I'm Ted.

OK, folks..rotfl!! Guling2.

Ted and I met at IIUM and saw bits of Separation (thanks, friend!) the best foreign movie then being screened at Comm Studio.Fantastic movie with a poetic ending ...also an annoying one.In a family breakup..no one wins.OK...we got the message.

A serious discussion with the film group...gosh...they wanted to move beyond IFF.A bit too rushed for me.We'll see what Dato' Sri will say if I get to meet up with her soon.

Malam: finally got to meet Bas and Sean.Kelakar giler diaorang berdua nih.Interesting projects highlighted and discussed.

Bumped into Raman and it's nice to know of his new interest in classical texts.I look fwd to reading them in translation.

The weekend

Saturday was particularly busy. Z's last day at KYUEM.Her Awards Day.The guest was a young CEO of a well-known organisation.I was told he had had 3 heart attacks (for someone so young and looking so fit!) I liked his speech for the graduating kids: return to Malaysia and serve the nation, prioritise community service and serve your aged parents no matter how busy or successful you are..their prayers are blessings to our lives.

But what was most touching was the speech by student rep, read by another student.Imran's dad passed away on Wednesday so he could not be there at the Awards Day but his speech had everyone in tears.He wrote it when his dad lay unconscious (due to a stroke which happened in KT while he was sitting his A Level exam in KL..it was during his last paper..his mom didn't inform him till after the exam and he rushed back to KT to be with his dad.The docs said there was no hope)

Imran said the same thing the CEO did: we often don't realise how important it is to spend time with our parents in our busy-ness..etc etc and started advising his friends the same stuff the older guy did just moments earlier.It touched my heart so much...that it took a successful corporate guy a lifetime to realise the same value a 20 year old realised in his brief moment facing his father's death...

I attended 2nd half of the film workshop.Azrain was playing The English Patient (which he had nicely censored).Fun and interesting discussions took place.Loads of laughter.Kelakar giler.

Malam: I attended a fun wedding (with British humour throughout).Never a dull moment.

Getting sentimentol

Gosh folks, I have just heard a sad news...one of my close friends is leaving IIUM.Weiii...rasa nak nangis nih!

Prof. AS has always been a friend who'd support me every time I kecoh over issues at our workplace.Dia je faham my way of thinking.Ahaks.

Why do people leave?

I can only guess:
1. frustration (possibly over things not moving fast enough)
2. better pay elsewhere
3. better working environment
4. greater opportunities to help those who appreciate your help
5. wanting new experience/s
6. wanting security (PR/citizenship)

The list could go on. I should not feel so emotionally (and intellectually) attached to a friendship.People come and go. There's always the internet.

Farewell AS.All the best!

The end of my regime

Upon being told I would no longer be heading CERDAS, I text-ed a couple of people including Nik.His text made me laugh: an end to the regime of Nor Faridah.

Kah3.It was a fun regime.Well, dictators would always say that,yah? :)

It is time to move on.I would still be kept busy with the Fest next year and the never ending invitations to speak at conferences.I won't be lonely, folks.Worry not for me.In fact, I want to be left alone so that I could focus on my writing.Both academic and creative ones.

But CERDAS has taught me a lot..and I appreciate every min of it.Will miss my team/friends but life is about moving on and giving better,regardless of where or who you are. You the King or you the Pauper.

Watch this space for future adventures. :)

A joyous reunion

I was too busy to write about a visit to an elderly NZ alumna's place with other NZ alums yesterday.He's not too well (suffering from cancer).We had planned this over the group's fb for some weeks.Alhamdulllilah it went very well despite early worries : that there would not be enough crowd to make the solat jemaah and doa selamat, there would not be enough food if the crowd was too big, etc etc.

Then on the day itself...Mazidah who was supposed to arrive at 3 pm was held back by the bubur man who was still cooking it at 3 pm! And they lost Adnan who was supposed to join them at Wangsamaju or something.He was late so depa tinggalkan dia.Haha.But he joined them in Kg Baru.

I had to pick up the two maids from Gombak.Carlotta was with me.Gayah was not so I was not sure of the way to the place.But found it from memory.Sakinah was so cekap in the kitchen.Ajmal didn't turn up.Sons arriving from overseas or something.

The best part was Zul doing the tazkirah on arti israk mikraj and tied it up to all our tests and hardships.Zul ni kalau consistent, cerah masa depan dia as ulama. :))

It was nice meeting new and old friends and TS and Puan Sri were looking well.

Now, on to the next big event...my UPM conference!

Silver Wedding Anniversary

Nik and I celebrate our silver wedding anniversary today, folks.That's 25 years of ups and downs, joys and tears together. I say alhamdullilah that the relationship remains strong and stable.

I would not say we had not been tested.Ohhh...many times, sometimes perhaps too often.Ahaks.Busy people are always like this. People like watching this old couple.They say we look loving together.Funny.Weird.Mis-matched.We accept all compliments and say syukur.Both of us are sometimes extremely different but there are times when we are also so similar.I guess over the years, we learn to accommodate and respect each other's need and also space.

Dr. Bubbles asked me not too long ago about keeping a marriage strong.Well, I think it is not up to us.It is grace by Allah.We are mere players but I can tell you this about Nik: he's sincere and respectful of me and of family values.Of marriage as an institution itself.I hope we will be continued to be protected by Allah.It's a bad world out there but we live on lots of prayers.Since I got married to Nik, he reads his doa aloud. You know this man loves you right from his soul.I would suggest every husband does that when solat berjemaah with the family.It's an open declaration of love, commitment, responsibility. I reflect upon these little,little things in the relationship every time I see red in my life. And your spouse is really your jodoh chosen by Allah.Treasure it.It is your only means of happiness for the Hereafter.If you don't screw it up.

For Nik: thank you for accepting me as I am, the most imperfect spouse one could ever have but honey, I truly truly truly love you and seek your forgiveness for all my bads.

Happy 25th anniversary and may Allah give us much more blessing, patience, grace and protection.Amin.

Events

The marks are all keyed in, folks.But more deadlines to meet.But having a demanding job is better than NOt having a job, right? So we say alhamdulillah for whatever there is.

I met old and new friends at the winners' alumni today.Enjoyed the national laureates' session.Could not help asking a question on inclusive literature for a multiracial society and the issue of not doing serious translations of literatures of the 'other'.Would have loved to stay longer but I had other commitments.Hope to catch up with some of the new friends I made (one Chinese Accountant and another a Chinese lady who studied all the Malay classics and read some Arabic.I mean where do these people come from??) Masli N.O. was funny when I asked him when did he find the time to write.He said when you can't sleep."You can't sleep, right?" he insisted (nak tergelak pulak).I can sleep, bro. and if I can't, I won't be able to write! :)

The best is meeting the MM Editor.Byk keperluan I dgn dia.Kah3.

Had to leave early to submit marks and all.Also rushing home early to prepare for tonite's dinner with Makoto and Carlotta and Nik.We are eating Japanese.

Egyptian jokes

My Arabic class yesterday was soooo mean.In a nice way.Dr. Saodah is back from her umrah where she prayed for both of us that our learning would be made easy...haha.On Friday's skyped lesson with my Arabic teacher, I thought I did miraculously well.And on Saturday, Dr. S and I didn't go on our normal " forgetting it every 5 mins" mode.We did well in our sentence making.Syukur.

Then came in the Egyptian jokes...here's sharing:

During Sadat's cruel regime where so many people were killed, even dogs were leaving the country.At the border, a dog was stopped and asked: why are you leaving?

Dog: Sadat is killing all the donkeys.

Guard: But you are not a donkey.

Dog: Do you think he knows the difference?

Lesson to be learnt: if you didn't lead your life well, you would still be the talk of town after your death.In a bad way.

Here's a more contemporary one:

During the Egyptian Spring, a protester wanted to distribute Hosni Mubarak's picture for reasons known only to him. So he photocopied Mubarak's pic on the poster but wht came out was a pic of a donkey. He tried and tried again.Same result.

A little boy watching this at a distance, said,"Why don't you do the reverse? Photocopy a pic of a donkey and see what happens?"

The older man did.And true enough, Mubarak's picture came out OK.

Lesson to be learnt: do not undermine young voices.

And oh! There's another one on Bush and Mubarak but I'm off to my Sunday wet market.

Fulbright Alumni Association of Malaysia 2012/13

Gayah brought me in to be one of the comm members for 2012/13 and I was put in charge of public talks.

Today was my first event with Assoc. Prof Sean Foley.We met the year he was here as a Fulbrighter.I dah tak ingat how we met but he and his family (wife) became friends with mine.Kasi talk kat EPF lagi on impact of the Arab Spring on world econs or something like that.Sean ni serba boleh.Umur baru 32 but bijak.Bapak dia lagi bijak.Mak dia laggiiiii bijak, both grads of Cornell (hence lies another common factor.His dad a philosopher turned poet.Power gila poems dia.Urat otak semua bersimpul thinking about wht he writes.Mak Sean,an economist).

What I like about this group is the opportunity to meet interesting scholars...intellectual passion is like candu.Alhamdullilah,the talk went well.We had Profs from OUM.Q&A session was also fun.Sean ckp Robert Fisk ambik kerja dia.Turun saham Fisk.I asked Sean if he noticed Fisk dah berubah on many issues with regard to the Middle East.I terkantoi.Bdk smart ni kata,sure sebab ME pun byk berubah.Kah kah kah.

With regard to Sheikh Tahir Jalaluddin ni,rupanya dia kontemporari dgn Sheikh Hadi.Sean kata kelompok Islamic modernist but I tanya bukan ke term tu oxymoronic or a juxtaposition?He said it is just to differentiate aliran conservative or traditional.Lepas tu he linked up aliran ni dgn Maher Zain.Clever connection! I like.I raised the possibility of Zain being influenced by Tariq Ramadan and of cos' this is not new..let's go back to Said Nursi and his disciple Gullen.Let's go back to the spirit of the Quran.Modernist tak modernist.It's been there.New era, new labels.

Next month,Prof Alan Lew pulak on coastal tourism.Another new thing.Watch this space.

life cycle

What a strange weekend it was.

We thought we were attending a kenduri cukur cucu of a cousin so I bought flowers and all for the mom (not sure how big the baby was..you know some people cukur when the baby is months old.Didn't want to buy babywear which might go to waste).

When we got there, found out it was a kenduri aqiqah.And the baby's 10 months old. :))
But it was nice catching up with news with Abg Jib and Kak Jah (they lived in Jeddah for years and just got home a couple of years ago).

Then we were supposed to attend a wedding but Nik received a phone call one of his relatives was in nazak.We changed plan (dari shopping kat Giant to going home and collecting his mom
and sister to visit Pakcik Zahari at the Selangor Specialist Hospital in Shah Alam).

Loh lah lok lek..we were late and Pakcik Zahari died while we were still going round and round in a circle trying to locate the hospital (we all tak biasa sgt with Shah Alam).The children were all there but yang sempat mengadap were Makcik Yah (the wife) and Mi (the eldest son who lives in Tganu..O&G engineer..a good son..since he found out the father had cancer in April, he would travel every week to care for the dad.Syurgalah bagi anak ini...I was so touched.One of his boys hafiz and mengaji sedap by the bedside).

We didn't stay for the funeral cos' my MIL pun tak larat.And we had the wedding to attend.
The lovely newly weds were beaming...a new life for them.

Birth-death-marriage...semua in one weekend.It makes you feel in awe of life. Bahawa hidup ini sentiasa berputar.It ain't static.A minute's sadness for one has another meaning of happiness for another at a different location, same time. Inikah yang dikatakan binary opposition?

Postcards from Tioman

We flew KL-Tioman-KL by Berjaya Air

The waterfall we walked miles to see (well, it felt like miles!) 

 The guide stopped in the middle of the jungle to show us 'pokok hidung'

 Save the turtle!

 Blind Jo ( a 6-year old blind turtle at the turtle conservatory)

 Fish we snorkelled at Tioman Island

 Sunset from my window, facing the sea

money cannot buy...

My gf and I got home Saturday morning from Tioman.We took 2 days off work/class to just destress ourselves.Both our  hubbies will go on a separate vacation with us next month or two and could not join us on this one.Nik was babysitting Z who was having her A Level exams (true enough, she came back on Friday cos' sakit gigi and terpaksa pi ke Nik's dentist at Tmn Tun)

My gf ni penakut.Nak masuk air, takut, nak snorkel, takut.Nak scuba, apatah lagi.I never knew she would be such  a boring travelling partner.Haha.But we had a good time.She'd accompany me wherever I went.Yang pelik, masuk hutan pi waterfall dia tak takut  pulak(just the two of us with a male guide!).I was like..oh tuhan..jgn la kami jadi mangsa rape...my zikir all the way, all the way.Haha.

The guide proved to be a professional one.Syukur alhamdulillah.My family will go on another trip and re-do what I did in Tioman.Same guide. :)

I came back with a bad flu.My panel doc said tolong jgn sebar kat org lain and wanted me to go around wearing mask (I miss Dr Jee who has migrated to Darwin.He would never ask me to wear a mask!)

Back at work.Meetings.Letters to sign.Papers to write.Theses to examine.Ohh mannn...I need another holiday.

But it's amazing how I could cook up something fast while invigilating the exam this morning for this evening's  Fulbright meeting.I have Prof Ida to speak on IP again, Prof Aslam on religion and econ dev in Msia, Dr Vellayan on 28 years of zooing and the future of wildlife conservation (woohoo!), Sean Foley (yet to beep him) and Alan (yet to remind him) on coastal tourism.Oklah tu, given the fact I am now working on organising this alone.

Bits and pieces

I'm jotting down random thoughts (yang tiada kena mengena dgn yang hidup atau mati) which I might incorporate in my short stories/novels later.

***************************************************************************

So we spoke of minibuses and street hawkers.

They have long gone, I said.Not without a sense of sadness.

30 years.Her parents had all migrated and lived with her and her family downunder.She never returned after graduation.And after meeting her love match.

This was the same girl who lent me her winter coat in the midst of a mild winter of a country so far away.And took me around and showed me the alien city she called hers.Her boyfriend (then boyfriend) tagged along and displayed equal warmth, equal hospitality.

30 years down the road, I never forgot either of them.And who would have guessed it took only a click of an "Enter" to reconnect.And continued where we left.A friendship based on innocence.Bordering on a need for a common identity.We were Malaysians abroad.

Ivy married a local Chinese.I married a local Malay.In a way, we never left home.Our race home.

She showed me pictures of her family members.The two boys.Me, my only girl.Next to her, a picture without a head.A hole.Sani's.

*****************************************************************************

You go fly kite! (in my anger)

Why are you so angry?

Talk to my hand.

And we went separate ways.

It was that easy.

A day later, he text-ed me: YOU go fly your kite now!
My anger had become his.

Was it that easy?

*****************************************************************************

Lyn and I decided we had enough of being women.

Let's just go away.

So we checked into a honeymoon suite meant for newly weds and lovers.

Because the room gave us value for money: free breakfast for two, free scuba diving, free snorkelling, free boatrides.

We got stares from those who thought we were two old lesbians.From some Greek island.We giggled all the way to a waiting boat.

*****************************************************************************

I'm here if you need me, Miss Bao private messaged me on facebook.
Thanks.I know you have been to me and survived, I wrote back.
Yoga, she said.

It's haram in Islam.
Dinz said it made her feel good.She's looking well these days.We'd have dinner in a bit.A lot to catch up with.News of the latest acquisition.A hamster.A kitten.A stray cat.What is left in this world to make us happy.We do not need a talking (back) partner.Both laughed hysterically.

Kassim left her months ago.I left Sani a fortnight yesterday.Call it a leaving game.An urban Malay couple's leaving game.We were becoming like the Hollywood stars.

*****************************************************************************

Handbags.Shoes.The branded ones were all his gifts to me.When we were still very much in love.And married. People said we looked good together.We never aged like other aged couples did.Give us your secret recipe, said one.I gave him my favourite cake.A way to a man's heart is through food, I said.In those days, I made time to bake.Roast.Grill.Sani loved eating.

He bought me things which would make me happy.

Those shoes.And those handbags.Now Lyn's.

*******************************************************************************

When Lyn had bruises from her possessive husband, I would be the first she'd call.

"Joy (ah), he did it again."

"I told you to leave him."

"I love him."

"This is not love. Lyn.This is attempted murder.Walk away."

"Not that easy.The kids, the house, the car, the shares."

I rolled my eyes till you'd see the whites.

**********************************************************************************

Ivy and I met for coffee one Summer she returned home.Just missing old friends.

I have problem coping with aging, she said.

You've come to the wrong person, I laughed.

And the whole afternoon was spent discussing our peri-menopausal conditions. We had fun.We did not look one bit we were peri-menopausal.

"Ohh..it's so good coming home. Being with you, Joy(ah).I hadn't laughed for so long."

"I thought you were happy living in the quietness of downunder."

"Not the outdoor type.Alan is."

And she thought of Sani.How would he cope with his breakfasts and dinners, she wondered.I was always there.Packed lunch and all.The goodbye kisses before work.The huggings.The teasings and secret coded conversations infront of mothers in law.

"Joy(ah), you think of Sani now?" Ivy was sharp.

"I do.Not easy to forget someone you first fell in love with and had a child with."

"What were both of you so angry about?"

Talk to my hand.

*******************************************************************************
Miss Bao rang to say she was coming to KL. She needed to do her yoga with me.

I smelled trouble.She and Pierre.
I took Miss Bao to the same island Lyn and I were a month ago. We stood by the beach and watch tiny anchovies jumped in a group, as though chasing the high tide.Miss Bao screamed in delight,saying she had never seen something so beautiful.Back in Hanoi, she lived by the lake.I had never seen anything as beautiful as her lake home.You always want something which is not yours,Miss Bao philosophised.

Then she told me about Pierre.

I was there when they first met.At a jazz club.He wrote her a poem saying the moment you walked in the door,I knew you were the one for me.I laughed because I knew it was from Bobby.The Hindi movie everyone could not forget in the 1970s.Miss Bao was not impressed.She was already in a deep relationship with someone.I was there too when she met him.Why do you think Miss Bao wanted to do her yoga in KL with me? We were that close.

He is suing me out of spite.Copyright matters.
Oh oh.Not another twisted love. So what are you going to do about it?
I don't know.
Can't you negotiate it peacefully? Professionally?
I tried.

And we continued to walk along the sandy beach, absorbing the air,the breeze,the sound of waves.We were both quiet with our own thoughts.

It was my work,he published it.I went to Sydney and the organiser (my ex) published some work without his permission.

(to be continued.Pls buy the novel when it's done.Ni iklan je.Harap maaf.)

Something old and something new

I found an old friend who I have not been in touch with for about 30 years yesterday.It's nice to know that your friends are doing so well even as they age.Or because they age?

And our brainstorming session with people from the film industry went so well yesterday that my colleagues from IRK were so inspired that they expressed their enthusiasm to help out.Syukur alhamdulillah.So we will have a film screening on June 18 to further refine what shariah compliant films are.I like my new friends.I used to think film makers are stupid.

And for those helping out behind the scene (esp. DK): thank you so much!

The first Professorial meeting went well too.I chaired a session on Intellectulal Property Rights and learnt so much about patenting.Prof. Ida (our homegrown IIUM student who went to Cambridge for her LLM and PhD in London) said not many know that there are other ways to protect your intellectual properties.Patents are just way too costly (esp. when you can't commercialise your products) and you lose your exclusiveness cos' you have to declare your secrets when you apply for patents (and they only last 15 years).A form of control to control knowledge, kan? Dah lah bayar beratus ribu, curi kita punya hardwork pulak.

I enjoyed the discussions (between those from Science/s and Prof Ida) on this.A whole new world for me, folks.

A not so quiet weekend

Aku Bukan Rozita

For some reasons only known to some of my fans (perasan giler di sini),I have been writing a short story in my head (again...!Nisah posted something on her fb wall on waiting for the right moment or environment to write as something self-illusory.Gua sudah terkantoi).

Tajuk yang sudah lama terbuku di kepala is this: Aku Bukan Rozita.

The story would go like this:Rozita is like Mona Lisa.Everyone wants to know who she is just because a painter had captured her beauty in a painting.Dia bukanlah cantik sangat pon.Ahaks.I would prefer my famous characters of Lola or Kasut Hitler's beauty than Rozita nih.

So everyone wants to know who she is, how she looks like in real life, apa makanan kegemarannya, etc. I have this in my mind: without makeup, she looks like nyonya sayor kat Hanoi who conned Amir,Z's friend at college.Come,come take picture with me.No need to pay.So you'd take what is free.Then nyonya will say,now that you have taken pictures with me, you have to buy my vegetables.

Well, Rozita in my short story is like that Nyonya sayor in Hanoi.Often misunderstood.Ahaks.An illusion.But she is not the Mona Lisa in the painting of that famous painter.Dia bukan Rozita, one individual who exists and lives outside the canvas.

Rozita dalam painting itu adalah composite characters of the painter's 5 girlfriends.Could be more.It's a technique also used by Obama when writing about his Nuyork gf (I akan contemporarise-kan sikit lah technique ni dalam my short story).Very artistic.I like. Kita sambung cerpen in progress ni di lain hari.Beep if you like.

Part 2, kita lihat adegan painter terlukis gambar kucing in his confusion trying to perfect his art.Ahaks.

And this was how I spent my weekend today...menulis cerita yang tiada after hours spent at the hair salon before rushing to meet Jeff and Minoo about our herbal garden.

The last class of the semester...

...ended nicely with my Master's English Renaissance Lit. Nice (sometimes funny) discussions on Renaissance women writers took place today.Kadang2 nak tergelak besar without being rude..Budak Thomas ni macam biasa buat smart remarks on Mary Ward...he said org2 Catholic ni suka buat cerita, mengAda-adakan cerita..he doubted if she really existed if the manuscript came from the Catholics (history had shown this, kata dia..300 years of lies).Wough! :)

But we still found the women amazing esp. Isabella Whitney, even Mary Wroth.And the autobiographers..my, my, I need to go on my sabbatical soon and I want to work on Renaissance women.It's all so so exciting.

Saber got a Band 6 for his reading (after 2 months being coached by me) Syukurlah! That is a big jump (from 4, you know).I'll have another experiment with Aishah.If she does well juga, I may have found a short cut to learning English. And will share this with those who care. :)

No class does not mean takda kerja tetap OK? I have papers to write, events to promote. But I do want to get away for a day or two just before exams.

Watch this space for postcards.

Happy Mother's Day

with some iranian friends

 At Shisha, Solaris Mount Kiara (full house mlm ni..I forgot to buat reservation) Look at that lauk pengantin!



Iranian Mom's Day Buffet at MATIC (home cooked by women from the Iranian Embassy)

To all moms out there: go spoil yourselves!!

I just did.

Had a fantastic time celebrating it at MATIC with the Iranian Embassy (women's wing). I enjoyed the fashion show and the tribute for Mdm Elahi of Tas Putra.What an incredible woman she is.

A few things I learnt from the event: Iranian women are so well educated (per centage is neck to neck when it comes to ratio of women to men at the university.Women have regular careers, they are also in sports.Whatever they do, they wear headcovers.The ones in sports seem to be doing well despite this.I was deeply impressed.They are also in broadcasting/media, arts and performance).

But I also found out that women could not recite the Quran in public.Yesterday when a lady started the event by Quran recitation, Yasmin Yusoff (the wonderful mc of the event looked gorgeous.Lawa pulak bila bertudung!) repeatedly reminded everyone not to do any videoing or photo-taking throughout the event out of respect for our Iranian sisters.Then I thought it was so disrecpectful when she kept saying, you see those ladies in blue? They will take away your cameras and videos if you are caught taking pictures or recording.Wough, she made it sound like we were back during Khomeini's time (Azar Nafisi's version).Semua nak kena tangkap! She could have said it differently, right? The ladies in blue were very nice people.They just reminded everyone in a friendly manner when the crowd went wild during the fashion show (I was so so tempted to capture those wonderful2 stylish wear)

The Iranian spread was also delicious but could not stay long ...had to rush to another makan: dining with the newly-weds at Solaris Mount Kiara, Dr. Bubbles and wife.Iranian cuisine juga (Shisha).We had a nice time, talking and talking and talking.And eating and eating and eating. :)

Besok pun makan dan makan dan makan (celebrating Z's bday with her friends at her college).Most probably hi tea with Nik's mom and dinner with my mom and sisters.This year's Mother's Day must be my busiest year!

Was trying to look up lagu Ben (not by Michael Jackson) which I heard over the radio as we cruised along the highway.Wough, on the road!

Tak jumpa..anyone knows? I thought it was by McCartney but not on the list.Maybe I should call up Richard and ask him (of Light and Easy).

Happy birthday, Z

 Z's friends at the college's park, enjoying her carrot cake bday cake, pizzas, muffins and Secret Valley drinks

 Z with some of her close friends here

Daddy's gal and friends (mommy was  inappropriately dressed to be in the pic.Ahaks)

This in-the-park celebration was held during the kids' A Level exam

Z turns 20 today.Happy birthday and semoga panjang umur, bertambah iman and dalam peliharaan Allah sentiasa, Z!

You have been a great joy in our life since the day you were born.Well, since the day I conceived you (made in London as you proudly whispered to Natalie..I heard!).

And as you work through your A Level exam papers this week and the 5 weeks that follow, I wish you much success, gal. May you find happiness in whatever you do.

Hugs,
Ibu

Your Drama Queen

I have more than a friend who think I'm your classic drama queen.Haha.

It's a super busy period now that we are finishing a semester.Tensi, OK? So much inspired by Chan's poetry about stars falling from the sky to river bed and her picking up the stars turned glasses and cutting her finger while picking up one, I created my own drama yesterday.Hey, I can still write!

Tiba-tiba another voice interrupted,"Why don't you just take a knife and cut me to pieces?" Wakakaka.

Hancai my script writing exercise!
The real one with FINAS will start in June.Outsiders RM500, IIUM students lesser.Pls beep me to enquire.

Drama Queen also puts up a protest over the cancellation of Irshad Manji's talk at IIUM.The dialogue would have been so fruitful (if everyone can stay civil and intellectual).

But I guess no one's ready for that, yet? Even Manji?

Go gently, Z!

Z is moving towards another phase of her life tomorrow...away from home.And mom.Her A level exam starts tmrw. She has been working hard and we pray to Allah, it would be easy for her. Meanwhile, her 'foster parents' were located today (on fb)We had been looking since 1998 when the young toddlers Neng and Z were separated.We are trying to arrange for a reunion between Neng and Z.Neng's parents live in Makassar now.Neng is at a uni in Bandung.If there's something I cannot live without..it's old friendship built on trust and mutual respect. And Neng's parents gave me that.May Allah shower them with eternal happiness which money cannot buy.

The best writing is...

...when you dare to write it as it is.

I find myself censoring a lot these days.It is not something new.I'm sure it grew on me.It gets worse as I lose touch with writing.So in the end, words appear stiff and so boring.The usual laughter is no longer there.

Who do you blame? Work?

There are so many things I want to write about.The guy who said "asalkan kak kiah putih sikit dari akaknya, it'd be fine." (of an aging man wanting to take another wife.Wife pertamanya "tanned" sikit.Sensitive, right? But this is one of kisah masyarakat..the 'di celah2 kehidupan' type.It'd be sad not to document it).

Then there's a story about a 6o something lady who takes a certain supplement and finds that her sex life is better than when she was 20 something.Ahaks.The West would love this kinda story.:)

If you have anything interesting to share with me, please beep.I may after all brave myself and write a thriller (as was suggested by Francis!)

To all labourers

Happy Labour Day!

I'll take it easy today.A day with my chiro, then possibly go watch Michelle Yeoh's movie on Aung San Suu Kyi , "The Lady". Nik and Z will tag along.

And I must finish up Jelani Harun's book on al Raniri's Bustan al-Salatin (2008). My fb life is over, folks. :)) I'm making time to read books I bought so long time ago but never found the time to read.

Jangan lah selepas 2 mukasurat, tertidur pulak!

The joy of teaching

Maybe I have been too long in this profession. But today's workshop on supervision and thesis writing had brought back the joy of teaching and imparting knowledge (not that my daily/weekly classes are no fun) but having a highly motivated group of students would take you up on a different level of joy.

And all those years of experience supervising and being supervised came back with lots of laugh.Hey, I can do this for another 100 years. :))

The guy from a (foreign?) TV station rang to remind me of tomorrow's interview (the time's changed). Malam ni kena rehearse la sikit jawaban-jawabannya.Maklum nak tayang kat Europe. :))

I'm ready to move forward with other new projects, folks. Watch this space.

Bruce Bennett In Memoriam

Prof.Quayum sent me an sms around noon today asking if it were true Bruce had passed away.I told him I had not heard and asked for his source.Kirp.It must have been true and googled for the news.

True enough.Bruce Bennett is dead.

I may not know him as long as Quayum did but since Manila 2007 (or it could have been 2 years earlier in Singapore cos' I remember him joining the night safari ), I met Bruce every two years at our Asiapac conference which meets every two years in different cities.When I offered to help host the conference in KL after Manila, Bruce was one of those who was the most encouraging (even after dicucuk2 oleh someone not to give it to me.Mark,Harry,Lily and Agnes were equally supportive when I got very upset by this back-stabbing episode by another fellow academician from another uni).Bruce (and also Dennis) stood by me and said they'd be in KL to support me all the way.And true enough, both Bruce and Dennis came despite being confronted by illness (Bruce was sick himself, Dennis' wife was also very ill).

Bruce would always remain in my mind as a gentleman, sincere, committed, kind-hearted and very, very graceful scholar.He had moved the world in his own quiet ways, putting Asiapac literatures as equally important as mainstream ones.He (and Dennis) were constantly speaking of passing the torch to younger academics like Q, Kit, me, Lily, Isabela, Agnes and so on.It will be a tough act to follow, Bruce.

I'm glad I was able to meet him in Perth last December and had the opportunity to pay tribute to what he had done to literature and art in the region at our 2009 Asiapac conference in KL.

RIP, Bruce. You will be sadly missed.

 Bruce was the first to arrive for the conference.Here, with a student (Shahrul)

Bruce with NZ High Commissioner's wife, Gillian at a dinner reception at the HC's home

Zaiton Othman

She was one of the fastest women in Asia.A Malaysian who grew up poor,had to walk to school and had poor nutrition.

Today, she's one of the best motivators in town.And in a conversation with a friend who attended her talk today,what struck me most was her courage,determination and focus as well as finding the balance in life.

My friend was telling me how Zaiton enjoyed being chased by an angry dog cos' it gave her the opportunity to run quicker than the mad dog.

I guess THAT was how she trained to be one of the fastest women on Asian track in the 80s.

We had many great athletes in the past....very colourful personalities too.

Your blog worth

I had a bit of a laugh recently after finding my blog worth and its rank in the USA.Who would have thought! I mean I write to capture certain moments in my life.Much to do with my family and friends.This blog is worth almost USD1K. :)).Well, at least some value.Thank you for your support (for those who are regular here).

It's been a hectic two days in which I had meetings spreading to the evenings.I think I have over committed but a promise is a promise.Will just need to execute whatever promised well.I had meetings with my caring society's group in my neighbourhood then another evening with other neighbourhoods in PJ.Jeff is so good with community building.It is such a joy working with him.Found a new friend,Minoo.We clicked! :)

And last night's meeting with my filmmaker friends went well into 11 pm.Nagat's suggestion of having a few workshops was good.Azrain would give me the figures.Wan and I would look for moneh and participants.Prof Abushouk agreed to give us promo panel in his Oct conference and we had at least 4 exciting personalities to invite.And Wan will work on producing a short film for the fest..our very own.I hope things will work out accordingly.

Fulbright Public Talk: Prof Alan Lew had agreed in principle to talk on tourism but probably would have to do it just after his conference towards end of June.

seizing the day, carpe diem

I have written a lot on my experience as the Director of CERDAS.Of my 24 years of working, I have to say that this is the most challenging and exciting post I have ever held.

I learn to swim when the office is sinking (the meeting on Monday is now postponed to another Monday in 3 weeks).But the best of all is learning how to be an enterpreneur (against my will but possibly this is by the will of Allah.Everything happens for a reason). I learned how to do clean business (without riba).Always mindful of NOT devising too much profit which will be oppressing our clients.What matters is our targetted groups learn something new and become better Muslims/people after their encounter with our progs.Social enterpreneurship, gitu.

Dr Haslina and I were laughing away at my reminder after editing a PhD thesis (from Uni. of Hong Kong) on Islamic Finance and Maritime Trade.There was a section on riba.I also heard on IKIM types of riba.So in our biz at CERDAS, we try to observe this.It's a feel good feeling lah after a task completed.Part of riba is hidden cost.It's a no-no.We were perplexed when Dr Azman (himself an Islamic Finance Consultant with one of the banks) revealed all our costs to our smart partners.Dr H asked me why would he want to tell all.Now we understand better. No hidden cost -- everything must be transparent (so Air Asia, read this!)

Also you cannot have a biz which is misleading (this I heard from IKIM radio) eg. selling a brand which sounds or looks like the original - Abibas vs Adidas, Coach vs Croach, etc is HARAM cos there is an element of deceit/misleading people.

We are (also) doing our best to act on complaints by students (much to do with admin. shortcomings).CERDAS does not make all the decisions and hence, solutions can be quite slow.For that, I have been called many names (by one or two students). Hey, it's part of the job and I accept this, humbly (I had accepted the post relunctantly when nominated, knowing how difficult it would be with only 2 staff at hand but my Dean said it was only for short term).

But as my term comes to an end, my conscience is clear.I HAD GIVEN MY BEST.No regrets.And I treasure the friendships I made with my fellow colleagues.Dr Haslina especially (who's like my shadow, day in, day out); Dr Riza who often comes rushing to assist despite her busy schedule taking care of her parents and her health, Prof Istiaq who will sacrifice his family time to help out when I holler, Prof Azman who often comes out with brilliant ideas on Islamic courses.Last but not least, Hasnah who has kept files in order and can just pluck one on demand.Simply amazing.
And our new Manager, Zul who would have late lunches cos' work comes first.

Alhamdulillah.

Can life be so jinxed?

I'm beginning to wonder now!

But it could be just something in your head.You become what you think.Negativity invites negative vibes but de Bono highlights on negative energy as a force to solve your problem, creatively.We are trying our best to paddle, OK? :)

Zul and Dr. Haslina found out some happy news with the auditors' report/s (Monday will be an interesting day when I am called to menghadap Tan Sri Aziz). The figures keep changing.I hope we are right this time.Working from evidence.

Tupin Aishah is a glamorous name.I want to write about her in my next short story.She's my great grandmother, said to be a princess from Sumatra in the 17th century before Dutch invasion.There were kingdoms and we owned one.Muahaha.Anak raja gondang. :))

I just found new second cousins. Was bonding with my mom over this and she wanted to know if I had met any of them in person.How I met them etc (what curious mind, this Rawa Queen).

Facebooks and blogs have their plus points.This is all I have to say.

Inspiring moments

I met 3 interesting and inspiring enterpreneurs today.M is from Cambridge, Ir Dr. F is local but was trained in NZ and then Oz.Wht a coincidence!Prof B is from London.I hope the workshop we hope to do together will work out.

Pelik juga how they are connected but they are strangers to one another.I came out feeling motivated and stronger.These successful people said they'd had more failures than successes before making their first million.Ahhh..wht a feeling.Dr Alizi and Dr Harris were laughing at my CERDAS stories over lunch.Prof B pun tompang sekaki.Haha.Mmg funny.

And I found a tukang urut who urut the hell out of me..sakit bukan sedikit but we agreed to meet again.:)

I enjoyed listening to Mehboob's talk and even more listening to Dr Fauzi's stories abt how he began until he gets to be so big (people travel from all over the world to learn from him and his org)

I can only say alhamdullilah that I had the opportunity to meet and know these people closeup.

Breaking news

a lot! a lot!

1.The new Manager is here.Trained as an engineer and has an MBA.I pray to God he will stay a couple of years with us.

2.Auditors came to report on their findings.We agreed the balance sheet/s prepared earlier were faulty (I warned them at the beginning).The new Manager and CERDAS team will revise and send a more accurate one.

3. All our progs made the profit of range 30% -72%.I have spoken with my Dean to regularise some events (to be parked under CERDAS.It's so easy to make money then).

4. Some chilly sauce has caused ripples.Haha.

5. Gimme projects with dough!

6.March and April: busy months with visitors from all over, London New York Manila Adelaide etc.Wough, fening.

kaboom!

and I have changed someone in the household into a rabbit! (Tanjung pulak hilang sejak semalam and I am so upset)

Don't wanna talk about it.

All day meeting with the SBU gang (we planned for a get together soon..Prof Ismail ajak durian party...I pretended to like it sebab semua org excited.hahaha...I don't like durian that it has become a family joke..on both sides..my family and Nik's cos' everyone is crazy about durian.)

CERDAS is still a pauper in comparison with the rest (told Prof Faris..nasib tak negatip..yang lain tu sibuk suruh kita bayar cukai 30% tu..haha..5 years tax-free OK?).A couple of SBUs have joined the millionaires' club. The new Manager dropped by semalam and today and seemed to have lots of ideas already.We can only pray that it would be a good year this year.

Petang : dropped by to listen to a panel discussion on the Arab Spring. Interesting juga.Told them to read Paul Collier's book The Bottom Billion.

A group of visitors from Yogyakarta (funny lot). One thot I was in PR, for passionately promoting IIUM. :))
Topics: Anies Baswedan, impact of reformasi, expanding middle class in Indonesia (yuppies), dev of arts, films and literature.I find it much more interesting having conversations wih Indonesian academics than say Msian academics. Muahaha..jgn marah!

Tersenyum sorang2 berjalan balik ke kulliyyah (the group was teasing me and I nak tergelak over a remark made by one of them :I am proud of IIUM") dan tiba2 Ali Adoun muncul siap bertali leher!

How long has it been? 2008? 2009? (some get-together with the family every now and then but last year, very rare).Biasalah Ali (who'd go..wallahi..no Prof Faridah, no alumni...hahaha) Tadi pun...we were discussing the Arab Spring.I shared with him my thots.He went wallahi ...you are right...wallahi I miss talking with you. :))

And this is how I become a passionate spokesperson of IIUM...

nb. Teja came back this morning.Bibik recited yassin 3 kali for her return.May Allah give peace to Bibik.

Post Spore trip

Wough, the whole trip was tiring.Midnite flight to KL.I got Nik to pick me up (tak larat nak mengangkut luggage turun naik train to KL Sentral.Lucky besoknya Saturday).

Besoknya: I could barely pick myself up.Rang up my Arabic teacher, telling him I'd be late.Penat woh. Dah la tak sempat buat homework, teacher buat lawak pulak and asked us to buat ayat in Arabic cerita balik lawak dia. I tried buat shortcut...tak jalan.

I thought tahun ni punya conference tak seseronok the first one I attended.Kirp was so kind to introduce me to the conference masa Kanika and team nak present their Krash Pad project (which impressed most at the conference.I had the Msian Deputy High Commisioner, an academic from Melbourne coming to me and wanting more collaborations.Good for the kids at Krash Pad and Kanika and team.We didn't expect the project to snowball like this.Syukurlah)

There were new faces and new sessions which I did enjoy.Marina Mahathir's keynote on Islam and Feminism was good, I thought (dia takda la sentuh benda2 sensitif in her address e.g safe sex pakai condom even for Muslims).

Hani (a new friend, lecturer, film maker, activist) showed us horrific short films about women trafficking and forest brothels in Spore.Rasa nak marah lah bila tengok mcm tu.The law makers bukan nak bertindak.Authorities yang patut protect, buat apa je?

I had to leave early but plan to return for the Broadway show playing till April.Wicked!(nama musical ni)

Back in Singapore

This is my New York of the East. :)

Got in very late tadi (I malas nak kensel class). There's a new boy in town dari England in my Master's class.Orang putih Muslim.He's a History major tapi entah macamana nak join my Renaissance class.Mula2 my students termalu2 but lama2 mcm biasa. Budak Thomas ni pun OK.Byk ilmu dia which we can tap also like the ancient Egyptians dah lama pandai bercukur so Tun Mahathir was wrong to say the Prophet (pbuh) tak bercukur sebab takda gillette masa tu.

Datin Seri Marina Mahathir will be the conference's keynote besok.But I'm looking fwd to attending workshop percuma on management...(I was told I boleh attend percuma....haha..me cheapskate!) Malam kita dine at Swiss restaurant.Jangan jeles....

I'll update my findings.Watch this space.

of IOK and a missing rabbit

The 4 of us: me, Dr. Haja Mohideen, Dr Ismail and Dr Mahmudul shared a panel on IOK and English.I thought it was fun.Mahmud ni kelakar and had everyone in stitches dgn lawak selambanya.

Teja went missing dah 3 hari. I have decided no more pets after this.Tanjung will be given to anyone who wants.Enough heartbreaks (every time rabbit mati, every time rabbit hilang).


I'm letting you go, Teja. Fly, good memories!

Poster competition

My Kulliyyah hosts this year's IRIIE and Mei and I submitted a poster.Thanks to friends in Prizma for giving ideas and helping out..Din Amri and Fudzail for recommending Din.

The fun bit was meeting other exhibitors from kulliyyah of sciences.best..kita belajar pasal commercial products mrk dibuat dari pokok sintok.kita siap beli.haha.We also taught them about Literature.

Yang tak tahan bila judges datang interbiu kita.Mcm pi viva. :))

Back in class, we did a session on hellenistic philosophy.Berasap kepala but pretty interesting when the students spoke of their readings on al kindi, ibn sina, ibn khaldun, ikhwan safa and we compared their ideas and influnces on modern thoughts.I think hellenistic philosophy ni over-ratedlah.

I think I'd sleep early tonight...long day,mah.

My Arabic class

CERDAS runs an Arabic class meant for busy people till May,about 60 hours for close to rm2k.I signed up cos was so impressed by the teaching tehniques shown in the corporate video.haha..i'm easily sold,kan?

But I've had 4 classes already and I think I can read and write better now as well as speak a bit walaupun ada masalah lupa.haha

Hari ni teacher bawak one lady from Holland to share with us how she survived the learning.she goes to yemen and stays there for a month annually and does an hour or two daily.sekarang she dtg msia cos the teacher lives in msia now.wow.mike tanya wht do you do for a living.i thot that was a funny question.haha.but jawabannya funnier.lady ni pilot helicopter.we went waaaaaahhhhh....

Today's lesson was very challenging.teacher suruh ambik barang2....sometimes mineral water bawah meja,kunci atas kerusi,bag mike,air mike,kunci khairunnisa.i rasa nak nangislah!then we had to construct sentences verbally.

And masa nilah kawan kita kat Spore jemput I pi conference 3 days all paid for.I said Saturday cannot woh..sayang my arabic class.Thursday and Friday line clear.It'd be good to see friends in Spore again..We'll see how.

The little, little things in life...

You know it's been one stressful experience, kan these last few weeks?

Just when my day was ending yesterday, Mei came to pick up some stuffs from the office.With a nicely wrapped gift for me.

Waaaahhhh...ini yang dikatakan rezeki datang dari arah yang tidak disangka-sangka.
She said Tania and she picked the colour I like.What, the black and white wrapper?

No..the purple leather purse, from Germany ke dik? :))
Waaahhh..thank you so much Mei!

Mei ni PR dia bagussss.She also wrote this:

Because you are so inspiring! Simply the greatest woman of the 21st century!

Haha..I thought I record this cos' it's the little, little things in life that will help cheer you up on bad days. :)

Mei, like most former students (now a colleague) has gone through ups and downs with me through the years (termasuk the recent crazy days in Perth). The purple purse is a tribute for all those years, gamaknya.

Terima kasihlah. We never expect material returns but if our students do well, kita tompang gumbira.

Dari dapor Mawar

Dr Mawar, saya sudah ciplak resipi asam pedas Dr.(diambil bulat2 dari blog Dr.):


Asam pedas ikan tenggiri


1.Lumatkan cili kering+bawang putih+bawang merah+halia+kunyit+lada hitam+belacan+jintan manis

2. Tumis campur kerisik+halba

3. Tambah air asam jawa, renihkan sambil masukkan ikan.

4. Tambahan petua Chef Wan, kisar daun kesum dan bunga kantan untuk serasikan dengan tumisan


TK!

In control

We learn to take charge of the chaos in the office and hey, true enough,we are now able to laugh at things.Dr Haslina had figured out how to key in the marks, I found my way to work on the matric cards and had struck a deal with the smartcard centre to have pics taken on registration day next sem. Dr. R is working on how to collect overdue fees in an effective way.

I told Hasnah, when everything is over and done with, I'm taking a week's break..no phone,no internet..jgn sapa berani kacau.Haha.Hoboy, I need this so badly! The gals and I also plan to go to a spa, mandi bunga..go away bad vibes!

I think things happen always for a good cause. Challenges are opportunities,so the cliche goes.And I think we came out stronger and more confident out of the crisis.

Well, until we hear from the auditors again of cos'.

At this point, ada aku kisah? Carpe diem.We accomplished much today.Syukurlah.

Z in Hanoi

Z left for her History trip to Hanoi on Friday.We tried calling her but gamaknya ph dia not roaming.

Hari ni Sabtu jam 10 malam lebih, dia telefon menangis2.You know the first fear every mother would feel kan when anak gadisnya di perantauan begitu dan di tempat2 begitu? I tell ya..suspen habis!

Rupa2nya purse dia dicompet org..habis credit card and duit USDnya.What can I say? Nik and I dah berkali2 pesan not to bring everything bila keluar, jaga handbag tu bla bla..and bukan dia tak pernah travel overseas (sejak setahun lebih OK?) dan tak tau habit kita bwk apa yang patut je bila keluar dan selebihnya simpan dlm peti besi kat hotel...unless hotel depa ni cikai takda peti besi??

I was like cacing panas trying to locate my Hanoi contact, Chan.Minggu ni minggu conference which I was supposed to be also (tapi sebab audit ada..aku terpaksa tak pergi..grrrgh!)Finally managed to locate Chan via the net.She promises to look into the matter sebaik conference dinner habis.Jgn satu Hanoi dia bungkus utk Z sudah.I knw Chan ni pemurah tersangat.

My Arabic class is getting tougher but fun.Kita tengah buat plan nak buat rombongan Cik Kiah ke Yemen utk perkukuhkan lagi bahasa kita.Duduk dgn keluarga angkat..mudah2an diizinkan Allah.

Thank God besok cuti panjang but will have to balik Raub with my sister on Monday.To fetch my mom yang balik 'bercuti' di rumahnya sendiri. :)

In the attic

The interview session was fun.Lots of laughter .There were so many talents and great personalities.If there were money, I'd employ them all.
The rest of us tried our best coping without the Manager.Someone likened the situation as a household of young kids whose maid had run away.I had to laugh at that despite the high level stress trying to locate files, visa forms, marks to be keyed in...I told my team, let's hope this time next week we'd be able to laugh at what had happened today.

We stayed back very late.I had to SOS our Spore partners.Razali was in Milan, Lake Como. Wah I envy him.Nak juga a holiday in Lake Como esp now!! Imran tak pasal2 being dragged in.Azwadi promised to drop by besok.See? There are still very nice people around.

And my colleagues were very cooperative whn asked to submit twice wht they had submitted earlier.Kalau I, I'd say go fly kites. :)

Could not have survived the day without Dr H, my PA and our part time Assistant.Besok lagi gila.

Cepatlah hari siang! Not answering calls,OK?