Farewell 2014

Tidak terjangkau fikiran kita betapa kita diuji begini rupa in 2014.Terlalu banyak dosa, keangkuhan, betrayals terhadap orang miskin dan yang berhak menerima keadilan dan harta karun. Belum kering airmata kita menangis, kita menangis lagi.

Adakah tangisan ini mencukupi? Tahun depan kita masih begini.Mengaji malas, solat pada waktunya tidak, makan tak sudah2, berfacebook mengata mengeji. Beginikah kita sehingga akhir hayat kita? Kita pohon kepada Allah Petunjuk, khotimah yang baik...walau apapun berlaku.

TF yang begitu gagah kelihatan cuma seorang yang begitu lost and beaten...macam that girl yang selalu menulis tentang cerita komuniti estetnya in my class.Semoga Allah beri dia kekuatan untuk mengenal diri dan Pencipta.

Prof Rahman told me cerita-cerita banjir di Kelantan.Yang terselamat kerana berkerebut pada dahan pokok.He lost his mom for a while but his son from Tganu came to search for her.Nasib jumpa! Another relative yang lumpuh diselamatkan oleh budak2 yang berakitkan batang pisang (that rakit can tampung this old man on his wheelchair..canggihnya rakit batang pisang ni...They should have lots of them handy di musim banjir).

Well 2014...leave gently now and I hope it does not get worse in 2015. Kita kasihan, Allah lagi Maha Mengasihani.Semoga kita semua kekal di dalam lindunganNya.

P/ S Gambar2 di bawah utk mengingatkan kita agar jgn tertipu dgn kemewahan dan warna warni kehidupan yg begitu fragile.

Antara Ayer dan Hawaii

Some people are lucky to be spending their Xmas vacation in Hawaii with Oh-bummer.Others wait for rescue boats which are not forthcoming.

Slow reactions to big floods esp in the East Coast this year.Part of it is because of the wrong signal saying everything is under control.Last year, everyone I knew was giving their bits to help out.This year...nothing.Hari Selasa baru nak mobilise things.Haiyo!

My family and I got together for tahlil and lunch at my place.Then after Zohr, we went bowling (5 teams).We had planned this for some time.

Some of us had also bought some stuffs for the flood victims.I'd have to hand over by Sunday.Orang2 surau kita pun doing their bit.Should have done earlier..floods happen every year.We should have prepared ourselves.I think there should also be more rescue boats placed in the East Coast.

Any other news would be improper at this stage.

Day two tahlil

Since Dr. Gayah and I were at work and could not attend the funeral and tahlil of aruah Tan Sri Ani Arope yesterday, G said she'd pick me before Maghrib to attend the day two tahlil at one of the suraus in Section 2, Shah Alam (dekat rumah aruah).They'd do the tahlil after Maghrib.

Nampak Ismail je.We wanted to drop by and visit Sakinah at her home...dia tak jawab ph pulak.Her mom is still in the hosp.Maybe she's there.But G and I were convinced she might need the space to grieve on her own terms.Lain kali sahaja kita drop by.We met new friends at the tahlil.Seronok juga solat kat different mosque/surau mcm ni.

G and I went down the memory lane on the memoir project which wanted to happen (semua project I mcm ni..they all have a life of their own).Then we thought how strange we were there a night before aruah pergi (less than 8 hours sebelum aruah meninggal) - and peristiwa utama the visit was Dr G's pledge that she'd work on the second edition.Aruah mmg serious on this.In Nov. he was still passing things to G.Sama2 lah kita doakan G will find the strength to honour the amanah.I can double chk je le cos' 2015 would be another busy year for me, InsyaAllah.

Busy Friday

Friday would be an early day for Dr. Farizah and I.Our class at the women's prison would start at 9 am.I slept late marking papers semlm so susah nak bangun awal.We were 30 mins late but stayed back an hour extra to do our interviews with our students.Tak sempat habis.Besok I have to finish off with the last two ladies.The authorities allow them two days extra so that they could finish their final entries for the anthology.

Dr. F told me while she saw I bergelak ketawa with my interviewees, she was crying with hers.I told her jgn get emotionally involved cos' we were on our task as researchers...keep the distance.But Dr F ni lembut jiwanya...she quit her Petronas job to look after her babies and only got back to do her PhD when the kids dah habis unis.So can I expect less of the mother in her? She told me how one of her interviewees said punya lama tak pegang pencil and paper/exercise book when she had them in our first class, she sampai tak tau how to use the pensel.And didn't know how to think anymore.

Beli anthology mereka bila keluar nanti, OK.We are also coming out with our own diaries (harap2 ada penerbit yang berminat nak terbit nanti).

Then I terkejar2 to chair my team on Kull Strategic Plannning.I delegated the morning job to Prof Thameem (I was group leader for Islamisation). But I came midway so after checking and editing our presentation slides,I minta Prof T to present them.Sekali sekala I menyampuk the Q&A.The rep from MQA kata he didn't expect our kull to do so well (apa dia ingat kita bodoh? He said we got A.I said A+! Someone said dah takda dah A+ now.Haha)

Then Gayah called kata Ismail beritau his dad in coma.Gayah kata let's visit Tan Sri Ani Arope.She offered to pick me up.Thank God! I dah penat sangat nak drive ke mana2.We went after Maghrib.

Ramai orang.Puan Sri pun warded kat sebelah bilik suami dia.Visited and berbual2 with her first.She's a very strong woman.Tetap anggun dlm apa keadaanpun.They were saying Tan Sri rimas duduk kat hospital and one day said dia nak turun ke Ground level, jalan2 ambik angin.Sampai kat bawah he told the butler to drive him home.Dia nak mandi kat rumah, main dgn kucing dia, etc.Then nurse called butler suruh balik by 4 pm nak feed milk.TS said tell her we'll go back at 6 pm.:D

Pagi tadi dia mula coma.Please send your prayers to a man who has done much to so many people.

NOTA KAKI (besoknya)
Tan Sri meninggal peacefully at 5.10 am pagi Sabtu 20/12/14.Dari Allah kita datang, kepadaNya kita kembali.Semoga Allah cucuri rahmah ke atas roh allahyarham dan menempatkannya di syurga firdaus.Dia banyak membantu orang miskin yang cerdik dan dari pertama kali saya jumpa dia dan keluarga di airport Auckland dalam tahun 80an dan kemudian di acara2 Fulbright kami, majlis reunion dan ziarah alumni NZ di rumahnya (we buat potluck sbb tak mau menyusahkan keluarganya tetapi Puan Sri dan Sakinah masak juga) dan akhirnya sebagai salah seorang editor memoirnya, allahyarham seorang yang sentiasa merendah diri dan bergaul mesra dengan sesiapa sahaja.Dan ini juga benar dengan semua ahli keluarganya.Dari isteri sehingga kepada anak2 mereka.Sangat rendah diri

I spy with my little eye...

We took the two gals out to the Curve yesterday, thinking it would be easy. Oh my, not with Nadra! At first it was fun playing their guessing game...I spy with my little eye.Nayli started it.Tengok2 Nadra pun dah pandai berspy2 but she cheated.Here is how it went with her:

Nadra: my turn! My turn! (When I wanted to go "I spy with my big eye...")

Me: ok, your turn.

Nadra: I spy with my little eye, sumpin (something) blue-like (it sounded blue light).

Puas Nayli and I cari anything blue in our immediate surrounding.All we could find was the blue sky.

Me:the blue sky!

Nadra: No!

Lepas tu kita main agak je..apa yang ada je.

Me and Nayli: blue car! (Yang tak ada)

Nadra: Yeshhh!

Dia main tipu.

Serigala jahat yang rongak

I was never convinced by the big huu haas of the big bad wolf thingy.Cheap will be as cheap gets.Here's my take on the whole thing:

A profitable way for people in the book industry to clear old stocks - jual buku yang tak laku elsewhere (just look at the dates: 2004, 2009, 2011; look also at the genres - the types which feed on your desires - cook books, diy books, children's books, pop fictions...with some luck, you'd find a small corner which carries some English lit titles which you could look up and read on your ebooks etc)

Yup, I was not sold.But then again, I do not have small kids to feast on those children's books.I guess you do get some bargains there.

I bought some old books (2004-2011) by thought gurus - how leaders teach their companies to win, letters from leaders and enchantment from the same author who wrote the art of the start.Books are meant to be kept not read - entah bila I can read them all, honestly! ( have started with enchantment, though)

Bibik and I did our Xmas shopping at The Mines - I took her on the water taxi on a return trip frm the mall to the KTM station and back.Bibik said mcm Italy yah...boat atas tasyik (tasik). I was also thinking "mcm Venice". This Bibik is the brightest bibik I ever have.She's going home soon cos' her daughter dah meragam.I know the feeling.Z was like that too towards the end of my PhD stint and I had to finish up writing the last two chapters from home.

Semoga the new  maid will be godsend too.

Aku nikah akan dikau...

...dengan si polan binti si polan.

Mohd, the son of our acupuncturist friend got married today (reception on his side).He's such a good young man who's also part of the team of their family biz.The reception had this wonderful concept: options of nasi lemak bungkus daun pisang, nasi kerabu, nasi dagang bungkus but with side dishes, kuay teow digoreng di situ and the usual nasi bryani (which orang tak berapa nak pandang).Nanti kalau Z kawin, I nak buat macam ni juga lah..you know how kita cepat muak eating the same wedding food time2 musim org kawin mcm sekarang? And it's just nice cos' bungkusan tu kawal how much we eat and becos' Wan is so health conscious, it was all healthy food (and drinks).

We asked Mat how he met his love.Mat malu2 bercerita. Dia sama umur with Z but a truly practising Muslim.He told us dia solat for petunjuk before he agreed to end his bachelorhood.

Mlm tu we went to my former student's reception at Lake Club.Another interesting wedding concept - open air, garden-like.Yang I suka, mkn putu mayam with kelapa kukur and gula merah.Oh wow! I ate it with the lauk pauk yg ada.Nasi bryani pun I tak brp nak lalu dah.Sapa punya wedding I went lauk ikan masin goreng and ulam2 in addition to makanan lain seperti gulai nangka, umbut kelapa, etc.Semua org suka! :))

Met with my former students of batch 2007. Cantik2 dan lawa2 now that mereka dah bekerja.
After the reception, dropped by Nazeer's bday party but he slept early so we ended up singing for Nadra cos' she insisted that it was her bday.Duh!

nasi lemak bungkus

nasi dagang bungkus

kuay teow goreng

nasi kerabu

Mat taking it easy

Nik Khairul's reception at Lake Garden Club

Dia datang

Batch 2007

mencincang cake

The middle child syndrome

Beginilah nasib cake Nazeer dibelah Nadra

But we still think she's adorable
(seen here eating ice cream dibuat Nayli)

The golden gals of IIUM

We were at Matric Subang Jaya, later Lembah Pantai
before moving to PJ campus

We hit 25 years at IIUM this evening.I can't believe that I have been driving back and forth IIUM for the last 25 years except for the years I lived abroad.Mak aii!

Tan Sri Prez said cohort ni la who built IIUM (which is slightly older than us). Sedih pulak memandang sekeliling dan bertemu rakan2 seangkatan zaman Matric, etc.Wow! Kami setia sungguh!

I was asked to give a speech on behalf of the recipients (ada 15th year and those retired also pun ada).I was so busy that only last nite je I had time to think deeply about it but I had interviewed some recipients so tht I would be truly representative.

It was inspiring to learn why those who stayed sampai pencen.Someone in the security service said cos' IIUM gave him lots of opportunity to increase his knowledge (training, skills, motivation).One lady said she loved the ukhwah she had with her colleagues.

Mmg terharu dgn rakan2 ni semua.Ironically I filled in a form to work in Europe today.Lepas geram over wht upset me last week.Sebenarnya I know I would not go anywhere! :))

I was saying to my Rector upstage dah tua dah I ni..dah 25 tahun at IIUM.Tan Sri tak perasan it was 25. He said 22 tahun ya? No ..I said..25 tahun Tan Sri.Altho I look 22 lah, I said.Rector pun tompang gelak.Haha.Being the witty man he was, TS said no, 20! I pulak nak tersedak mendengarnya. :D

Well, thank you for the great years,IIUM.Semoga Allah menerima bakti kami.Inilah pantun yg I sempat googled last minute since semua org dok berpantun at IIUM's functions now.

Tanam lenggur, tumbuh kelapa
Terbit bunga, pucuk mati
Budi tuan/puan kami tak lupa
Telah terpahat di dalam hati

Sampai skrg, I do not know the meaning of lenggur.It could be lenggun cos' I could not even read my own handwriting now.

One of the Deans said, mlm ni speech I begitu politically correct.I said well, I was speaking on behalf of others.Haha. Orang berbudi, kita berbahasa.Bising2 tu waktu kerja tu biasa la.Tak betul, kita marah. ;)

Yang pasti, we enjoyed meeting old friends and good cuisine.

Earn your respect

You have to earn it.Anything given is meaningless.No short cuts so do not be too proud if your journey to be the No. 1 was uneventful and short.The downfall will be even more swift.

Napa ni, you may ask.

I was in a conversation with my siblings about gen y being Bosses.They may be intelligent...Harvard sana, LSE sini, but as my other colleague said, maturity isn't there.A sister said (well two sisters actually) kerjanya dok berkejar mengadu ke no. 1 when things go wrong.Haha.How like my young nieces and cucu sedara.Sikit2 report ke mak/abah si polan tu buat.

My advice to young leaders: learn to work with diversities (class, race, gender, nationality, age) and be friendly with your grassroots. Jgn dok jadi little emperors or little rajas/queens. Takda sapa nak layan. And please, no four letter words (not at my workplace..ni I hear from another female friend).... konon bosses dia ivy league grads sangat...respect your female colleagues OK boys? You want respect, there ought to be self-respect first.Some of the stories are really shocking...you don't expect workplace harassments by these super kids would have anything to do with you being female.Totally disgusting. Patut lagi pandai lagi beradab.Padan juga my Prez buka kelas adab at IIUM. :D

Young guests at dinner

Guess who came to dinner?

Their mom was working late so she rang her brother and asked if he could pick up the gals and take them home.We thought bringing them over to our plc and get them to dine with us would be wonderful.So I went to buy what was banned in the household since Gaza war: KFC.Yeah...unfortunately the two gals susah nak makan.Except for fried chicken.

They got stuck in the jam.Nadra duduk kat belakang dah terbelit with the safety belt so kecoh sikit without the car seat.By the time they arrived, everyone looked so hungry and tired.Poor kids.Long hours at the childcare centre if mom is working late.

It's nice to have small feet running around the house once again.But I have changed my mind of adopting anyone.I don't think I will survive. Kejap2 OK lah.But the kids are so cute.Nayly asked, "Can you give me a surprise every time I visit your house?" Mak ooii! Nadra asked if she could take home the sporty toy cars.I said nanti Uncle Dee marah.She put them back where she took them.Pandai!

School vacation and wedding season

It is so heart warming listening to the excitement of young families talking about where they are taking their young children for holidays.Sal is taking hers to Langkawi.Eishah is exploring the northern provinces sambil ikut suaminya berceramah.Adik (my niece) is still clueless but is going somewhere (she just got back from Seoul on a family vacation as well). Nik and I bak kata Gita - terkulat-kulat cos' we don't have little ones to go holidaying with.Semalam we took Nayli out for an ice cream.Nadra mati keras tak mau ikut (she's so distrustful of us.Haha).She got scolded by her mom  for getting the big pack of famous amos berterabur.She ran to me and hugged my legs and between tears said she wanted to leave home (umur baru 3 tahun dah pandai nak lari dari rumah!).I said ok, ok.Aunty Nor will help you leave home.Then she said I don't want to leave home. Drama queen betul.

Nadra in her lemon tree costume

(on her concert day)

We went to Bangi to attend Haji Razali and Kak Hajjah Rokiah's son's wedding reception.What a beautiful venue...open space, garden like.The cuisine was nice.We caught up with news of other jumaah of our 2000 hajj group. Haji Melaka is now a doctorate academic.Mak dia masih sihat.Wahhhh...so berkat panjang umur.Yasmin and Mohsein could not make it.Haji Khalid is in Sabah on some job.I hope we'll have a reunion soon.We were close (satu bilik or sebelah menyebelah..we took the cheapest package.Muasasah masa tu.But we had fun as a close knit community)

Di sebalik tirai besi - democratising education

We are coming towards the end of our project at the women's prison.We did a quick survey on how the students had changed from their 3 months plus encounter with me and team.

It's a wonderful, wonderful feedback and we will be documenting our findings in a book soon.Yang paling menyentuh hati, students who could not speak or write in Malay could do so and proudly doing it in their short stories in Malay.Those who wish to write in English are also improving their English.Alhamdulillah berbaloi getting up early in the morning and travelling so far from one end of the world to the other.

Lagi satu episode is when one of the students (non-Malay) minta ayah dia belikan kamus Bahasa Melayu to improve her Malay and she is so motivated that she gets her Malay friends to teach her how to speak Malay correctly (working on her pronunciation).

Yang juga menyentuh hati my student from the estate is now so confident that she is documenting her estate stories (which I love so much cos' I learn more about her community in those settings).

I know it will be sad when the project comes to an end.The students' self esteem is so high that they are now so popular dan digelar penulis every time they walk around the prison.They tell us it gives them a sense of pride and makes them want to work harder and produce the best.

Today we acted scenes from their writings to see what else to edit.When you act out, nampak lebih nyata what works, what does not.Senang sikit nak edit apa yang tak kena or giving a different voice or giving a voice to a character yang dipinggirkan.

Saya doakan hanya yang baik-baik dan semoga projek ini mencapai matlamatnya.