Post Raya Blues

Nik, Zafirah and I would get up early every morning to jog and exercise to lose fats we gained over Raya.When we get home, another plate of bee hoon or nasi lemak melambai-lambai mesra.The following day the routine continues.We weigh ourselves daily too.The weight remains the same.Comes weekends, more open houses...

Today we were in Banting at En. Hamdan's place.He and his family ni orang baik2.Very da humble.When you step into his home, you feel the berkat of the house.Kita makan macam open house tu utk kita sahaja (the Thal group had its monthly meeting in Banting this month cos' Hamdan says come and feel the distance.We believe him now and Dr Zul says lain kali if he cannot attend our weekly meeting for the Dec. Charity Dinner, it's OK.Banting memangggggggggggg jaauuuuhhh.I cannot imagine Hamdan driving back from PJ to Banting after we finish our meetings late at night).Dr Zul kata mungkin next time we can all meet halfway -- buat meeting at his hospital pulak in Shah Alam.People in Cheras and Ampang pulak komplen. :)

But we had fun today.The spread was really good.Semua isteri Hamdan buat.Rendang dia yang paling sedap.And the kuah kacang...nothing like mine at all (remember, mine kena re-do?)

Lepas tu ada 'drama' but I think I will write another entry on this.Pasal orang suka percaya bomoh hingga boleh sebabkan keluarga bercerai berai.I can't believe it that we are still this tahyul (and syirik!)

My advice is..the moment you bump into this kinda group, avoid them at all cost.Berkawanlah dgn org2 yang hidup dan matinya kerana Allah dan mereka percaya rezeki semua datang dari Allah bukan kerana 'sial badan' seseorang.

Selamat Hari Raya

It's still Ramadan but the Raya atmosphere is here as long lost friends begin to pour in their raya wishes and remind me of Raya during student days abroad.Saniah claimed I love to cry on Raya.The funny thing is I DON'T remember crying at all! Tapi impossible juga kalau tak menangis. :)

Then Badri wrote to say Kak Yasmin's and Abang Nizam's son is now doing his Master's at IIUM.I quickly rang him up.We both don't know each other.He was so small when I was in NZ but I know his Kiwi Dad sent him to sekolah pondok in Indonesia so anak orang putih ni bukan saja boleh cakap Arab, English tetapi Melayu juga.Masa Raya kat NZ dulu, rumah mak dialah kita lepak sebab it's one of the few Malay homes in town.

Lepas tu Dr A pulak wrote saying he took my advice to perform hajj while young cos' hajj is not for the old.He goes to Makkah almost yearly now.I have not heard from him for so long (since 2000) so it's nice to know he's still alive. Dia kawan Noraini at Monash so N and I had some laughs today over our student days,suka berkelahi dengan boys. :))

This year my raya will be biasa sahaja.I have decided to spend it with my mom first cos' she's 73 this year.I usually spend it with Nik's family in PJ and after lunch balik Raub and spend a week there.But mom says she needs me malam raya.She says that every year so this year,I will do as she wishes.But it will mean I have to rush back to KL to spend it with Nik's family pulak.Hmmph.Balik awal KL boring sebab people will still be away...open houses won't start so soon.

For those celebrating raya here's my e-card for all of you (cut and paste to view).Maaf zahir batin.

http://www.heartsincards.com//index.php?step=pickup&cs_id=e88283219fe9052

Kerenah birokrasi di universiti tempatan

Hari ini saya bersama kawan-kawan yang mewakili Persatuan Pensyarah universiti/uni kolej masing-masing di dalam satu perjumpaan dgn KPT di Putrajaya.Kita tau bila orang serius nak buat kerja/tidak dan saya memang tabik hormat Dato Mustafa w/pun ramai orang Kelantan tak berapa suka dgn dia.Tetapi di dalam ramai2 Menteri tu, dia yang saya tengok paling kuat bekerja dan paling menjaga masa. :) Dan dia hormatkan orang.Even masa dia kat Treasury lagi (saya tahu sebab suami saya cakap! Dia dapat nota terima kasih dari Dato Mustafa.Bagi orang biasa, dapat nota terima kasih tulisan tangan dari Timbalan Menteri..waktu itu..amatlah besar artinya terutama he wasn't doing a favour for him sekadar menjalankan tugas yang diamanahkan)

Anyway, hari ini kami bincang kerenah birokrasi di universiti.Perbincangan melintasi masa sehingga hosts kami semua terpaksa minta diri! Ha ha.Lain kali adakan satu hari khas untuk kami.Pensyarah bila bercakap, dia tak pernah tahu berhenti.

Yang menggembirakan hati saya ialah bertemu kawan2 seperjuangan.Bukanlah kami ini anti-establishment tapi saya bangga dgn rakan2 yang sanggup travel dari Sabah, Sarawak Perlis, Pulau Pinang atas 3 days' notice utk membantu membaiki sistem di universiti.Saya tumpang kawan dari Universiti Malaya sebab malas nak drive ke Putrajaya dari Gombak.Mengabeh ko boraih sahajo terutama jika hanya untuk bercakap satu ayat pendek! :)

Salah seorang kawan cerita pasal Azmi dipanggil Ketuanya sebab tulis dalam STAR pasal pilihanraya di kampus.Kena warned..jangan tulih2 lagi.I tak faham sebab apa kita takut sangat dgn budak2 kita.Biarkan sahaja mereka belajar berpolitik.Ini sebahagian dari membesar.Dah kerja esok,mereka akan hilang minat.Lebih penting buat duit untuk rumah besar, isteri besar. :)

Jika kita terlalu takut, semua benda nak censor/monitor..macamana kita nak capai even top 100 best universiti? Kita ini terlalu control freak.Lepaskan sahaja anak2 kita.Kita dah bekalkan mereka ilmu yang cukup.Benarkan mereka berfikir.Sekiranya mereka jatuh, mereka akan bangun kembali, lebih kuat dari sebelumnya.

Dan itulah bakal pemimpin kita di masa hadapan!

Performance Poetry Workshop with Francesca Beard

I read about the workshop in Sharon Bakar's blog (thanks Sharon!) I wrote in to a British Council email and applied.It was a while before I heard anything.I thought I didn't qualify (age factor!) But I did so off I went (lost again for the 3rd time to KLPAC) and found there were older people at the workshop (or OK..more or less my age).There's a mix of old and young and it's wonderful.

Francesca lives up to her fame as the British Queen of Performance Poetry. I have seen poets performed (this guy from the Caribbean, this lady from Japan and some of our very own are pretty good too) but Francesca is not a poet, she's a story teller!(she'd first start by narrating a story/extracting answers from the audience then she'd continue with her poetry in story telling form..sometimes she sings! There's one which reminds me so much of Leonard Cohen..is she a fan too?)

At the workshop just hours earlier,we wrote many things about identity, fear/self-censorship and were asked to explore why we censor, why we fear, etc, etc.

I learnt a few tricks: that poets can manipulate audiences so we can lie and we can steal other people's lives.

I find when I did that, my work became even more powerful!Francesca and several people at the w/shop came to me and said they liked my work.Hmmmph....Here's one of the few pieces I wrote at the workshop (one on introducing myself):

I remember Kirpal Singh writing the same piece
asking 'how do i introduce me?'

Do you start by telling
what your name is?
or what your occupation is?
Is that really you?

Or do race and religion matter more than your nationality?

I will start with my little toe
it is a bit crooked
for that,I limp a little
and this scar on the upper lip?
that will never make me anything closer to Angelina Jolie
THAT I received when quarelling with my little sister
becos' she took my mom's love
away from me

I will also begin with these eyes
half Chinese half Afghan
which will make them 4 generations old


the mind travels like a
space shuttle
going back and forth
planet Earth.

And I will keep searching
for ways to
introduce me.


But I liked the one on Allahyarhamah Dr Latifah whose funeral I missed cos' I thought funerals could wait while I finished up work in the office.But I am still mourning and it pains me so much just to type the piece all over again (for non-Malaysians reading my blog, you must know that Muslim funerals are swift.Burial is usually quick and sometimes far away relatives will miss paying their last respect.We don't believe in allowing the body to rot and hence, the quick burial)

Ramadan

It is my favourite month cos' somehow I am in control of time (or feel so) I have more time to connect to everything outside work. That's the wonderful part of it.

But still...I have some nice memories of my kampong..mandi sungai (bathing in the river berkemban as an 8 or 10 years old girl) Best ooo...balancing yourself on the rakit was an experience too.The rakit didn't last for my gal to experience.The river is no longer a recreational place.

So when Alfian documents a dying kampong, I could relate to it.People have left, the old surau is now abandoned and drug addicts are everywhere.

When Jai and I showed the bedok (shown in the play) to our kids, they went blank.They could not recognise the kemenyan scent (Gene bakar kemenyan in one scene).My daughter asked, "Bau apa ini, Ibu?" Jai's grimaced, "What is this nasty smell?" How do you explain?

Can we bring back our kampongs so that our kids do not feel so culturally alienated?

School Reunion

Last night I was at my school reunion (Mahmud Secondary School Raub).It was organised by Batch 1973 (I was of Batch 1980).I was there cos' the President's sister was my classmate and she said they needed to fill a table and could we please share a table? (at this point, I wasn't aware that it was not actually open to all..only those celebrating their 50th year).For old times' sake, I said OK although the idea of sitting up all night with middle aged friends, whining about stones in the kidneys or weight they'd put on or rising cholestrol level..wasn't that appealing. :)

Anyway...

I met a few friends who I had not seen since I left school in 1980.They all have done well in their lives...(the boys kawin lambat..some baru dapat anak!the most intelligent and popular boy sampai sekarang tak kawin2.One friend said it's becos' he's a stud..too many women and not knowing who to marry or sees no need to marry)We carried the spirit of celebrating Msian multiculturalism at the reunion (I was the only Malay who turned up at the Batch 1980 table.The rest were too busy working on meeting deadlines I guess.Or busy with young kids.Or taming down grumpy husbands!)

But I value my school days friends (esp those from my younger days..friends from MGS days who would eventually be at MSSR.They were at the reunion too)They helped shape who I am today.We had gone through life together.We may be of different race and religion, but sometimes we are like blood sisters.SF whose first marriage failed some years ago is now remarried and I feel for her.I share her happiness and I pray it will last.The boys...my mom used to complain apa la budak2 ni datang pagi sangat beraya! But they never failed to turn up for ketupat and lemang every raya.I promised them this year it would be no different.Please come eat your ketupat and rendang.After 27 years!

We often speak of racism in Msia.It is hard to be racist when you feel like brothers and sisters.And I think we need to instil this amongst our young ones.

Our teachers (well into their 60s and 70s) were there too.One teacher said many of them retired as teachers not because they didn't have any options in life to move on but because they truly loved teaching.I almost cried at that.It is true..I think the teachers we had were of a different class.They laid us solid foundations and it is no surprise that amidst us were the second richest man in Hong Kong...MDs and CEOs of this and that...

As a Malay, I had learned commitment, determination and diligence from my Chinese/Indian friends.I hope they had learned something from me too. :)

Book review

There have been quite a few book reviews written on my The Art of Naming: A Muslim Woman's Journey. But I would like to share with you the latest, reviewed by Dr Norman Simm of New Zealand.This appeared in a journal called Matrix. For those who haven't bought your copies, please get them from MPH Midvalley or email me direct at Faridah dot Manaf at gmail dot com

Nor Faridah Abdul Manaf.2006.The Art of Naming: A Muslim Woman’s Journey./Satu Perjalanan Wanita Muslim. Subang Jaya: Awards Publishing.123pp.ISBN 983-42784-0-3.


Reviewed by Norman Simms, University of Waikato, Hamilton, New Zealand.


Half in English, half in Bahasa Malaysia, this little book of poetry, with an introduction by Susan Sheridan praising the author’s feminist credentials, confirms our first impression that this is a very important document in a world filled with fanaticism, hatred and ignorance. It is not just that Nor Faridah writes in clear, crisp verses about her pride in being a Muslim woman at a time when to so many in the West (at least) that seems, if not an erroneous then at least a foolish thing to do, but that her poems celebrate her own education, world-travels, and wide-circle of friends in diverse cultures and countries, something the press of the daily news makes us sit up and think about – for we are made to feel it is politically correct only to focus on different people in their own little nationalistic spaces. But here in this Muslim woman’s modest and understated poetic lines is the true meaning of cosmopolitanism, as well as of tolerance and compassion.

There is nothing political in Nor Faridah’s poems. They are about herself, her family, her friends, about being a foreign student in New Zealand, Australia and the UK, about getting married, having children, and pursuing a career, about thinking, feeling, loving and being in the world. They are also poems about poems and other literary experiences. But they are not simplistic and nice, sweet or sentimental;rather they are disarmingly brief, cutting, to the point because being in the world for anyone, especially a Muslim woman in the early twenty-first century, is no easy or light matter. Take, for instance, this brief piece called “Balancing acts in Hanoi”:

The vegetable woman
Walks as if on a tight
Rope
But life is not a
Circus
If not here, she would be serving
Some white
Men too hungry for
Asian flesh and sweat.

Though I can’t tell what wonderful musicality and wit there might be in the Malay version of this poem, it is quite clear that a powerful sense of the need to expose injustice in the world and speak for those who are maltreated drives the plainspoken voice of this poet.

In another poem the topic of which seems so odd to the eyes and mind of a modern Western reader some other kind of rhetorical game is played. “The veil which is me” begins with these opening lines and also says what can only be a shock, a provocation – a shock to middle-class secular sensibilities, a provocation to prejudices about traditional roles of women in patriarchal religions:

The veil which is me
Is also my body my mind

The absence of punctuation reduces the chance of rationalizing away the implications of such a statement. Then the reader is irked even more when addressed directly and told not to impose his (her) tastes and expectations:

Never wonder the length of my
Hair
Or ask to know its colour
Unveil it, says the wind
Show us your poetry

But who does the wind speak for here – some kind of universal or local voice of disapproval? But to show poetry in this way is an impertinence, a violation of the woman’s own integrity as a person, a Muslim, a poet. What text we are reading is doing is challenging us not to know in the normal way we think we ought to know what poetry is, a natural wind-born assumption, but to accept our own position of ignorance about some things in order to appreciate others, those which the poet will allow us to see and hear, and therefore to take the things we do not know about as a condition for being privy to the rest of the work of literature. Hence the poem goes on:

But poetry must never be written
for the wind
An imagined swaying audience
Must never be
My poetry is for the sea
It would never undress itself
For something sacred simply be

Yes, some things must be simply be accepted, taken as given, and what is sacred, what does not belong to the world that can be questioned or ordered to explain itself, is here taken as oceanic, profound, vast and over-whelming. Yet there is, at the same time, something very disturbing about this implied contrast between the wind and the sea: both sway. It may be that this ambiguity, this problematical relationship between what is allowed and what is forbidden, is below the surface if but for an instant. The mystery is too dark to be explained here.


Other mysteries exist, aside from what is hidden to non-Malay readers, particularly in the private and intimate poems alluding to persons, events and feelings perhaps known to the poet herself and no one else. Nevertheless, it is this sense of deeply private that balances the poems of ideological and religious statement. Hence we find “Love Thoughts (in memory of…)”:


like butterflies they stay awhile
and ‘out of season’ rain brings
chills
to the heart…

it’s like loving someone

is too mysterious to be expressed in a little poem of this sort. Yet there is more, another two short lines:

The veil, poetry and me
A float which never swims.
Three separate but related, contiguous but which is not equivalent to or mirrored, things, like the veil, the body, and the mind in the second line of the poem. The contrast here is between the float and what swims, what rests calmly above the sea perhaps moved by the wind and what cuts through the waters exposing what.

Merdeka Day

It's not easy to wish Happy Merdeka Day to all of you here.Does this make me less a Malaysian?
For many of us, it will be just another public holiday.For others, it'll mean late nights and fireworks.Not too far from where I live, some celebrities (top singers) will lead a street party.My family and I never attended any of these in the past despite pressures made by my teenage daughter. I fear for my safety.Also I hate walking cos' parking would be a problem in events like this one. In the past, we would hold family get togethers: barbecues, steam boats and whatever new recipes one would have to show off at the gathering.We held doa selamat also for the wealth, health and happiness Allah had given us.

It's 2006 now.

A lot of changes have taken place even within the family. We try to take turn caring for our aged parent.Some would be too busy to take that ride home on what used to be a public holiday ritual: balik kampung, visit mak.I was hoping I could take time out the coming semester break but no....I have to stay back at work and attend an in house training (for 2 of the 3 days break we have)...It is at times like this that I begin to wonder of how much value we place on attending to family needs or having respect for workers' need for a break! Looks like I will have to wait a wee bit more before I can visit my mom. Comes puasa, hubby will be away in London for 3 weeks and without him, no visits anywhere.I don't drive long distance balik kampung...wough, real tough!

On a different note, it was a shock to discover how a student had to change her name to a Mat Salleh name to attract customers at the bank! (not owned by Malaysians) She and her Indian friend(also given a Christian name) were not too happy with this kind of discrimination so they did the wisest thing:quit their job at the bank. Not too long ago the nation was shocked with the tudung issue thing (of how a tudung-ed woman was pressured to leave her position cos' of her tudung..the company was also not owned by Malaysians)

I think it is a real case of "I sound stupid if I speak Malay" (literally). So ladies and gentlemen, am I so wrong for not being able to wish you Happy Merdeka Day?

Women's Summit 2006

Ini kali kedua saya menulis entri Women's Summit ini.Yang mula2 ter-delete ke hapa ke.
Kita bermula dari awal:

Summit 2006 yang ke 4 diadakan oleh Kementerian Pembangunan Wanita, Keluarga dan Masyarakat di Sime Darby Convention Centre, Bukit Kiara. Tahun ini fungsinya mungkin sebahagian dari kempen pilihanraya! Tak kisahlah.Andainya ia kempen, ia telah berjaya! Saya suka hati sangat menghadiri konvensyen semua wanita ini.Bukan apa, mana ada di konvensyen2 biasa, kami boleh berborak kuat2 di waktu makan tengahari pasal pengalaman dan trauma kami bersalin, menyusukan anak dan lain2? Lucu sungguh bila mengenangkan kebiulan kami sebagai ibu2 muda. Kata seorang wanita saintis Melayu di meja itu..cara membanyakkan air susu ialah meletakkan daun kobis di badan! Lucunya! Tak pernah saya dengar petua ni.Kobis ni sayur negeri2 sejuk! (Nyata yang bercakap tu dibesarkan di kota dan luarnegara.Tapi beliau cukup penyantun orangnya.Fasih bahasa melayunya.Berpuasa di bulan Rejab pula!)

Woon, ahli korporat yang berhenti kerja sebab nak jaga bayi pertamanya menceritakan bagaimana pam elektriknya gagal mengeluarkan minuman susu utk anak tapi saya tak dapat ceritakan apa Woon buat sebagai alternatif tetapi saya hampir tercekik ketawa mendengar satu lagi kisah lucu! Tengahari tu memang puas kami bercerita sebagai wanita.

Yang paling menyentuh dan memberi inspirasi ialah cerita Diane Rose menrealisasikan impiannya menjaga tradisi dan warisan budaya Melanau di Mukah.Tanpa bantuan bank dan kerajaan di peringkat awal (ditolak mentah2), beliau berjaya menyakinkan seisi kampung (dari anak2 muda hingga ke orang tua) menyayangi dan menjaga budaya Melanau dgn pembinaan Lamin Dananya.Lamin Dana was featured in Lonely Planet dan Diane telah memberi peluang pekerjaan kpd anak2 kampung dan org2 tua dan wanita melalui kegiatan2 pelancungan : tukang2 urut, tukang buat bakul, budak2 yang buat part time menari dan bermain musik tradisional..semua dapat habuan dari projek rumah kampung Diane ini.

Dunia luar melutut kepada kampung yang begitu terpinggir itu.Diane akan wajibkan pelancung bawa buku ke kampungnya dan baca kpd anak2 Mukah! Kalau dulu budak2 tak berbaju itu berkelebang tak tentu arah..sekarang mereka semua ada peranan di dalam masyarakat.Mereka belajar buka business sendiri (jual burger Melanau) di samping menjadi duta kpd budaya mereka.Sudah pasti takda budaya lepak atau dadah di sini sebab budak2 ini mempunyai self-esteem yang kukuh.

Kata Diane: asal saya tak punya apa2.Saya cuma seorang anak kampung yang suka bermimpi. Saya tak punya kawan yang ada kuasa.Atau harta benda yang lain.Cuma sebuah mimpi untuk membina Lamin Dana.

Saya harap graduan2 kita akan ambik ikhtibar.Jgn kita bermimpi nak jadi hamba orang lain (lepas graduate, tunggu nak kerja dgn orang dan selagi tak dapat kerja di sebelah rumah, kita tunggu kasi tambah angka pengangguran).Kerja banyak dan ada di mana2. Kita kena kreatif sahaja dan tabah mencuba dari bawah.Diane bukan je buat dunianya sendiri..dia juga buka peluang pekerjaan kpd mereka yang memerlukan.

Wanita-wanita berhati mulia

Hari ini berbaldi-baldi saya menangis walaupun dengan rasa malu sebab Prof Kirpal Singh (dari Singapore Management University) duduk di sebelah saya. Tapi siapa yang tidak akan menangis menonton video tentang Palestine dan Lebanon yang ditayangkan oleh Dr Ang Swee Chai? Wanita perubatan beragama Kristian ini berkata sebelum beliau melihat sendiri pembunuhan beramai2 di Sabra-Shatila 1982, beliau penyokong fanatik Israel dan melihat org2 Muslim tu jahat dan org2 Palestine itu pun jahat.Selepas kegiatan kemanusiaannya di rantau itu, makanan Israel pun tidak lalu beliau makan sebab kecewa dan marahnya beliau terhadap kekejaman rejim itu merobak rabik kemanusian di Palestine & Lebanon. Dr Ang dari Pulau Pinang tetapi kini rakyat Britain tetapi beliau bekerjasama dgn MERCY Msia dan berkawan baik dgn Dr Jemilah yang seakan teman inspirasinya.Kasih sayang antara dua sahabat ini ketara di perjumpaan mereka di UIA hari ini anjuran Dr Hariyati. Saya rasa bersyukur dapat berkenal mesra dengan dua wanita berhati mulia ini.Tidak mungkin saya dapat menjadi mereka, meninggalkan dunia selesa untuk membantu orang lain.Tetapi kata Dato' Dr Jemilah memang kerja2 begini bukan semua orang boleh buat.Tetapi kita buat lah apa yang kita mampu.Saya kata kalau nak suruh saya menulis, itu mudah bagi saya tapi kalau nak minta pakai boots, mengharungi banjir air atau banjir darah..sukar saya bayangkan! Mungkin saya yang pengsan dahulu.

Tetapi charity bermula dari rumah, kata Dr Jemilah.Kita boleh bekerja dgn org2 yang kurang bernasib baik di negara kita sendiri : penagih dadah, org2 buta dan pekak, org asli, dll (jadi jgn bermula dgn tempat2 jauh ini..kalau tidak jadi disaster tourism sahaja, katanya..click! click! ambik gambar, senyum2 sambil hulur kotak2 pakaian/ubatan/selimut, lepas tu balik Msia, tidur nyenyak.Itulah namanya disaster tourism.Berapa ramai org buat begini?)

http://www.inminds.co.uk/from-beirut-to-jerusalem.html

Kata Dr Jemilah, kalau kita asingkan seminggu atau sebulan setahun dalam hidup kita buat kerja amal (tapi mesti konsisten), bayangkan berapa ramai org kita dah bantu.
Mereka yang bekerja sebagai pekerja kemanusiaan ini bukan calang2 orang. Mereka tidak membesar secara tiba2.Biasanya ibubapa mereka pun dari kalangan selfless people.Tetapi sifat ini boleh dibentuk dan sekolah dan universiti adalah ladang yang subur untuk pembinaan sifat mulia ini. Patut ia jadi sebahagian dari kurikulum kita.Community work patut diberikan credit (amali semasa 3rd semester)

Harap2 Rektor saya baca blog ni. :))

Orang Melayu

Hari ini Prof Dato Shamsul Amri datang beri syarahan tentang Malay and Malayness.Saya lebih suka beliau sebagai budak band Juara Kugiran RTM dalam tahun 70an dulu. Dia dan ATMA buat saya rasa seperti bahan makmal...atau seperti red-indian dari kawasan reservation..jadi bahan kajian...


Siapakah orang Melayu hari ini? Saya rasa semuanya bergantung kepada 'state of mind' kita.Kalau kita rasa dan fikir kita Melayu, maka Melayulah kita.Jika tidak, tidaklah.Saya rasa peratus orang Melayu malu menjadi Melayu adalah tinggi. Kita kena kaji apa yang menyebabkan kita begini.

Saya sedang mencari bahan mengenai orang-orang Rawa.Jika sesiapa boleh tolong saya, sila emel secepat mungkin.Kata Prof Khoo Kay Kim mereka ini ramai di Gopeng dan Negeri Sembilan.Terkenal dengan ilmu hitam mereka.Ayo yo! Yang saya terbaca dalam JMBRAS ialah mereka ini seafaring people, sukakan emas. Juga saya dengar mereka ini dari kalangan raja-raja. Saya mahu dengar lagi.Tolong emel.

Booksigning and talk at MPH

 Megamall Mid-valley (12/8/06):

Came the day, I was not well.But luckily I found back my voice. But there was quite a crowd (mainly my students, former students who would bring in their own students or family members) Some of my colleagues in the Dept also came (the delegation headed by Prof Quayum, our HOD). There were also new faces...those who came because of the advertisement placed by MPH.

We had a good time reading.When I was too 'tired' (still under heavy influence of paracetamol, antibiotics and cough mixture!) to read, I let the audience do it (Syeela and Deela had to do their share as planned). Moomala's students from Sek. Integrasi Gombak were the most spontaneous and sporting. They had travelled on the LRT to Bangsar for the occasion.Earlier Eric Forbes wrote in Quill that publishers would only publish what the market wants and definitely it will not be poetry. I guess this is one of the reasons why I decided to publish The Art of Naming: to go against the market because what's flooded in the market has never really catered to the needs of our soul. Maka, jadi lah kita semua manusia-manusia berhati batu yang tidak boleh merasa apa-apa perasaan.

It was a fun one hour at MPH and it was poetry we did!
I wish to thank everyone present (one former student had travelled all the way from Kuala Trengganu for the occasion!) and those who had helped out whether directly or indirectly.

God bless!

Beeplah saya!

Beeplah saya sekiranya saya lupa nak kemaskinikan blog ini
Maklum sahaja saya ini hamba sahaya
Di sebuah negara yang merdeka


Beeplah saya
sekiranya saya terlupa
untuk menulis tentang apa saja
yang berlaku di sekitar kita

Semalam saya di Port Dickson
bersama teman-teman penulis nasional
saya tersepit di tengah-tengah bijak pandai Malaysia
yang datangnya dari merata-rata
dari Macang hingga ke Vienna
Hamburg tak kurang jua
ijazah yang berjela saya bawa dari New Zealand, England dan Australia (dah saya kata 'berjela')
tidak bererti apa-apa
saya bawa kisah Da Vinci Code mereka tanya mana kisah klasik lama-lama
saya kata belum sempat baca kerana saya sarjana 'muda'
eleh! mengada-ngada

tetapi beeplah saya
jika saya terlupa
membawa wacana yang lebih besar dan bermakna
untuk terus memerdekakan kita

Budak-budak di bawah 18 tahun dilarang masuk ke blog ini

Ini kerana saya telah terima aduan tidak bertulis dari seorang teman kelas anak saya (Tingkatan 2) yang mengatakan blog ini sangat membosankan.

Ha ha ha.

Saya rasa sebab mereka tidak cukup umur untuk memahami dunia orang tua.
Atau memang saya ini membosankan (tetapi inilah komplen pertama saya.Ha ha)
Budak2 sekarang amat pintar dan kritikal pemikirannya.Saya fikir anggapan bahawa sistem pendidikan kita telah gagal adalah satu kenyataan berat sebelah. Majikan fikirkan gagal kerana universiti tidak membentuk pekerja yang pasang siap untuk mereka. Ahhh...Tan Sri Wan Zahid selalu kata debat 'purist' dan 'utilitarian' begini sampai bila2 tak habis.

Saya rasa tak perlu kita pakai label2 itu dalam kita cuba mewujudkan satu sistem pendidikan yang mantap. Memang bukan tugas uni mengeluarkan pekerja pasang siap.Itu kerja sekolah2 teknik atau vokesyional.Kalau tak, pergi je ke tempat2 yang buat professional courses.Nyata mereka ini digemari industri.Tetapi mereka ini akan bertahan selama 5 tahun shj (sebab teknologi dan ilmu berubah dgn pantas dalam masa 5 tahun) dan lepas tu majikan mula cari salah : tak boleh fikir! tak guna common sense dan lain2 lagi.Saya percaya graduan universiti yang betul2 mengeluarkan thinkers/leaders tidak menerima nasib malang sebegini.Mereka ini boleh survive dalam apa keadaan sekali pun (skill baru boleh diajar bila2 masa oleh organisasi mereka) dan akan meningkat begitu cepat di dalam karier mereka (ada anak2 murid saya yang masih menulis memberitahu dev. mereka yang begitu cepat melompat dalam masa 4 tahun di multinational organisations.Alhamdulillah!)

Mengapa universiti atau kerajaan perlu jadi hamba industri..mengikut telunjuk mereka pada masa mereka kehendaki? Lagipun ramai graduan kita akhirnya bekerja dgn kerajaan dan mereka berbahasa Melayu juga akhirnya. :)

Ini tidak bermakna saya menidakkan keperluan peningkatan diri seseorang itu dgn pelbagai ilmu (esp. mastering English dan lain2 bahasa ekonomi dunia) tetapi 'university bashing' oleh pihak industry tidak harus berterusan. Macam kita ni tidak buat kerja apa2 grooming graduan2 kita.
Kita terima belakang parang semasa mereka masuk kepada kita.4 tahun mengasahnya sampai bersinar, takkan tiada siapa nak cakap terima kasih? In fact, ada satu surat to the editor sebuah akhbar kata academics gaji besar tapi kerja takda. Saya tak tau university lain tetapi di UIA, kami tua sebelum masa. Kami pikul amanah yang diserahkan kpd kami dgn bersungguh2 tanpa kira masa.

ISO Craze

I have nothing against ISOs or SOPs or what have you. In fact, I think they are great! It becomes crazy when you pretend and play foul in your attempt to get that ISO certification.This includes painting everything nice and rosy when the auditors come and taking them out again (e.g facilities you claim your organisation has) the moment they turn around.I wonder how many organisations do this. I hope IIUM doesn't! I hope auditors will not judge the physical appearance only (or that all the documents are in order).Talking to the grassroot is very, very important.This includes talking to the students, administrative staff and hey, even our cleaners and gardeners to hear if goodness has really spilled over to everyone, regardless of class, gender and faith. :)

My Kulliyyah is on the verge of applying for a certain ISO for a certain thing. I think this is excellent. I know it will not be easy. We always think of the money involved (have we it? Is it enough? ), the commitment, the teamwork and stamina of staff to see it through...and later, the spirit to maintain what you have achieved. This is probably more difficult than starting out.

I have faith as long as it is done with good intention (no foul play). To my Kulliyyah, good luck! The support will always be there. May Allah guide us and give us enough sabar (patience) to be where we want to be.

From Jimmy Walter to William Rodriguez to Yvonne Ridley to Dinsman

June started with an attitude. I had the opportunity to listen to great minds of the 21st century.I met thinkers, writers, people who had been 'rudely awakened'. Jimmy is an American (but he lives in Vienna now), William is from Puerto Rico (he lives in New York), Yvonne is from England (she lives in London, I think) and Dinsman is Malaysian (he lives in KL, I'm sure). All spoke on the lies behind Sept 11, 2001 and how innocent lives were sacrificed not only in the tragic collapses of the twin towers and other buildings surrounding them (there were 7 buildings altogether..this fact was never highlighted in the news) but those in wars in Afghanistan, Iraq, Palestine and I hope NOT in the future Iran, Syria, Saudi, Sudan or even Malaysia.

They all spoke from their hearts.No agenda and if it was a propaganda, what's there for them? (Jimmy is already a billionaire..how much money does he need if he's doing this for money? William was offered great opportunities to live comfortably in the US, Yvonne left her good secular life to be a practising Muslim and Dinsman could have been the Chairman of Utusan Melayu or DBP if that was what he wanted in this life).But no! They gave it all away to seek truth, justice, integrity.

I was touched.I felt shame for most of us, proud of our rich living.Jimmy and William are not Muslims but they give more than what rich Muslims could give to this world.They set good examples for us who claim we believe.

June came in not gently.
June came and set us all thinking.
Reflecting.

Misyar O Misyar

Saya sudah berasa lega bila isu tidak berfaedah ini ditutup rapi oleh akhbar yang mula-mula mengecohkannya apabila CEO IKIM bersuara tegas mengatakan kita hanya membuang masa membicarakan hal2 yang tidak membawa kita lebih hampir kepada Allah tetapi hanya memenuhi tuntutan nafsu semata-mata.Pada hari yang sama di akhbar yang sama, Penolong Pengarah YADIM juga menengahkan isu pokok perkahwinan.Rata-rata perkataan yang timbul adalah ia 'tanggungjawab'; ia 'amanah' dan kaum lelaki mempunyai peranan mengerudi hala tuju keluarganya.

Tetapi akhbar2 Inggeris pula memutarkan semula isu itu hari ini. Arggh!

Saya juga pelik (sebagai orang yang tidak berilmu tinggi di bidang2 hukum Islam) bagaimana para ulema lelaki kita baik di tanahair biarpun di luar sana, begitu cepat mengiyakan misyar ini walaupun mereka tahu betapa banyaknya ayat2 Quran dan hadis tentang perkahwinan di dalam Islam.Mereka juga pastinya tahu Rasulullah yang sewajarnya menjadi contoh dan ikutan kita semua juga telah mengahwini wanita kaya tetapi Rasululah tidak minta dimisyarkan.

Jadi akhirnya saya sendiri bimbang dan takut akan ulama-ulama ini (sangat-sangat takut sebenarnnya)...apakah mereka ini golongan ulama akhir zaman yang telah diberi amaran kpd kita bahwa inilah tanda kiamat yang hampir?
Saya selalu melihat diri saya sebagai orang yang terakhir yang akan mempertahankan institusi ulama2..tetapi dgn lahirnya isu misyar ini, saya tidak lagi pasti!

Saya hanya akan mengikut panduan Quran (terutama apa sahaja di dalam An Nisa') dan gaya hidup Rasullulah (s.a.w.) Ini muktamad.

Misyar adalah amalan lelaki dayus! (dan wanita yang bertopengkan agama membeli sebuah perkahwinan bagi memenuhi tuntutan fizikal dan emosi tetapi tidak spiritual)

Desas desus kononnya misyar menyelamatkan kaum wanita adalah alasan.Di mana juara-juara ini bila wanita diperkosa? Disepak-terajang kerana sang suami ingin berpoligami tanpa mengikut batasan agama? Mereka membaca cerita2 wanita di dalam celah2 kehidupan tanpa mahu mengeluarkan fatwa : ini harus dihentikan.Lelaki yang menyiksa wanita harus dihukum berat.

Tetapi bila isu misyar, ramai lelaki bangun dan berkata Islam mengiyakan ini.Ini sah! (Memanglah apa-apa perkahwinan dgn izin wanita sah tapi adakah itu cara hidup yang diajar oleh Rasulullah?)

Satu cara mengatasi fahaman begini sempit ialah mendidik anak-anak perempuan kita agar sekiranya mereka diberikan rezeki oleh Allah lebih dari kebanyakan lelaki yang bakal mengahwininya, pilihlah yang beriman yang tahu hukum hakam agama dan tahu tuntutan agama ke atasnya sebagai suami yang bertanggung-jawab.Jangan kawin kerana tuntutan seks semata.

Frontliners O Frontliners

Has it ever occurred to you that we may represent our organisations no matter what we do and where we are? Even when we are not in our working attire?

I think employers should be smart about who they employ as frontliners.By that I mean staff who meet the public first: security guards, telephonists, receptionists, secretaries, cafeteria owners, etc etc.
But I think very few organisations care about their frontliners.Very often they are ill-paid, ill-attired and most importantly, ill-trained. I have come across many in my day-to-day dealing with prime organisations in our country.The so-called 'corporate organisations' which actually are still populated by former government civil servants.I would have thought that once they have changed their status as 'corporation', steps would be taken to train their staff to live up to the corporate world expectations: efficiency, alertness, having informed and courteous staff as well as those values you dream of as a customer wanting the best service money can pay.

I don't want to name names but Selangor has a long way to go if it wants to maintain its status as a developed state (status negeri maju). Frontliners are very important...money should be spent to train them. If there is one organisation I so admire, it would be EPF.It takes only one ring to get someone to speak on the other end.

Smile as you answer your phone. And know your stuff well!

The book is out!

Syukur alhamdulillah, my first book of poetry is now out. When Daud (my printer, also my brother-in-law) rang up to say the books were ready, I rushed to collect.Laa..40 copies only.The rest were still at his "kilang".

But I sold what I could. My husband bought the first 5 copies (dia ada juga minta discount). My daughter sold a copy to her school library (the deal was she'd get a certain percentage and she's eager because she's working on finding her own money to buy her regular teenage mag which I'm not sponsoring anymore).

Bila pi kerja yang paling best.Pantang jumpa kawan! "You wanna buy my book?" But I managed to sell quite a bit.Friends at IIUM are very supportive.Ada yang beli sampai 2 copies.Nak bagi kat kakak.How sweet!

The lady at the post office pun hampir jadi mangsa as she saw me busy mailing copies to my reviewers. "Kak tulis sendiri ke buku ni kak?" Iya, nak beli? :))

The media has been kind too (not Nik's connection.Nik is too busy to introduce me to his media network).It helps knowing a few in the circuit.Ni tengah memikir macamana nak masuk TV.Rancangan Nona ke Nyonya ke saya tak kisah.

Would it not be nice to have a slot just to discuss new books on TV and radio? Otherwise, how can our nation be a K-based nation?

I was at UUM recently. It's a very beautiful, spacious, green and self-contained campus.They are building a new hotel on campus in addition to the University Inn they already have. I stayed at the Inn.Quite an experience.

Sadly, I had no time to go to Siam.