Almost done

Went to send docos to one of the clients semalam.A good thing I brought Sue, my Thai intern.She's so good to work with.I also have M from Jeddah.Sue said Saudi government kasi anak buah dia RM6k sebulan as their scholarship.M ni ada motor besar he bought for RM70k kata Sue.But M pun boleh harap.They help me a lot when Zul ain't around.

Sue and I stopped at KLCC to buy a gift for Widad who just got married.I'll see Kak Ani later this week or early next week to pass on the gift.

Prof Zein dropped by and we had a good laugh over visa probs we seem to have.Singapore scrutinises Sudanese passports walhal Zein has been travelling to Spore over the last 10 years to teach  there.Terrorists do not come from the Sudan.They are the most educated and gentle Muslims one can get.I suruh M pi ambik ptg ni dgn motor besar dia.Hopefully siap.Zein has to fly to Kota Singa on Friday or Sat morning.

The book is almost done. Gayah and I worked late last night with Tharkundas on the phone.He's good with words! No wonder he makes a good lawyer.Very humble too.Lega now one book project is out of the way.Two to go.Possibly 3 if the translation meeting I'm having with the gang next week decides that we are coming out with a book.Haiyo.I hope not.

Have a good week ahead you.

Holiday

Sal & family left for Turkey today.Mak flew to JB, carrying her passport with the intention of crossing over the Causeway I'm sure. :) They all deserve time away.Ours will be soon InsyaAllah.

Went to send my kain2 for baju raya.No choice cos' the lady said baju kurung biasa je boleh...no fancy2.I pun dah tak ter-fancy dah tua2 ni.Asalkan selesa dipakai, dah.

Next week will be busy gila, collecting cheques and attending meetings.Let's hope so and so will support our event and give us some grant.

Have a good weekend folks.Today all I did was melepak with Nik.

Least expected

If you follow Radio Ikim, between 8.10 am and 8.20 am, they would play the doa dhuha about rezeki dipohon keluar kiri kanan, atas bawah etc.I love listening to it (I think by UNIC) sbb syahdu sgt.

Today, that rezeki from arah tak disangka came.I had a big quarrel with my mom...dah 2 hari dingin.I think it's my hormonal imbalance thingy...this peri menopausal thingy is turning me into a monster when rubbed the wrong way.Then I get tired being angry with so many things.

So I doa that I do not become anak durhaka and that Allah would not uji me with what I could not handle.I hope Allah would understand my monster came out cos' of my hormones...

So I worked mcm biasa.Then the phone rang.Someone said my short story (first published in Mingguan Malaysia in 2004) was chosen to be one of the texts for Form 4 Sastera and would be used in Msian schools.I was like what? Biar betul! "Perspektif" read in 2013 is still relevant.Mcm future writing la pulak! But I said alhamdulillah..it cheered me up.

As a show of gratitude, I bought my mom laksa Johor and daging dendeng.We made up (Bibik had pujuk her and my sister and niece rang her up...it doesn't take much for my mom to be happy.I think she got depressed cos' no one else showed her love.I was her only hope and I was mean.Kesian, kan?)

One day, I'm going to write about this mother-daughter relationship in a novel.

Wangi kasturi

G and I drove to Shah Alam to meet with lawyer Tharkundas and we dined with Tan Sri Ani Arope.T brought chicken and mutton bryani from his son's famous restaurant.I loved the salad (raita...just add yoghurt to chopped tomatoes, cucumbers, onions, coriander leaves).We discussed the article which might have legal implications.T will edit bits of wht ain't right.

Then G wanted to pick up Aishah's pet at DU.We started telling each other ghost stories...kalu malam je, this will be my fav...cerita hantu.Lepas tu I naik takut cos' after dropping G off at her home, I kena drive sorang2.Mcm2 in my mind...hantu rambut Afro kat belakang my seat..(Manan is spotting this hairdo on his fb profile), makcik nenek kebayan...etc etc.

G was telling me about her bro in law who died after solat subuh semasa bermesra-mesra with the wife..he hugged her after solat, told her he loved her and just went dlm her dakapan.Wow.Semasa mandi jenazah, bau harum kasturi that everyone started talking.Aruah masa hidup tak byk ckp.

I baru ckp dgn Dr. Riza 2-3 hari lepas psl her story jenazah seharum kasturi...semua jenis tak cakap byk.We had vowed not to talk so much. :))

I am done filtering IYSFC entries...ngam2 50 entries from 12 institutions.Alhamdulillah.When we first started, we were so afraid that there would not be enough entries.I thought if we got 10 pun dah syukur.We need only 3 winners.A few entries made me cry...so touching...stories of school bullies, victims of child abuse, cerita budak cacat..tak kurang cerita bdk lelaki akil baligh...haha..I thought that was so funny...story about a boy coming of age.


Today I gaduh with my laundry man.My sheepskin shrunk.I told him they had tertukar my fluffy rug with someone else's so ugly and dirty.Even the two gals manning the shop said they remember mine was nicer.I told the guy, Sabtu nanti sambung gaduh. I was too busy to exert myself over some silly looking rug (his, not mine)

Mother's Day

I worked over the weekends.But had time to get my mom a fruit hamper.Gave Bibik a purple rose too for Hari Ibu.I think she went teary a bit.Like me, she has a single child.

My mom yg kelihatan depressed cheered up after I gave her her basket of buah2an..both fresh and canned plus some cookies...maybe Kak Ngah, me and Nik will go out and dine with her lepas Maghrib.Sal balik Tapah so she may not be able to join us.

Rita and Farah pun dpt flowers cos' I figured they would not have time to go to the florist so early.Wrong.Farah punya florist dah start berjual jam 8 am.Rita mmg tak sempat so she was thankful I tlg beli her mom stg nice. :)

I don't mind if we have gone commercial on this day.Biarlah.Mak kita suka dapat bunga dan hadiah.:))

Selamat menyambut Hari Ibu.Jgn fikirkan asal usulnya kerana yg penting niat kita meraikan Ibu kita dan betapa Allah begitu menyukai perbuatan menggembirakan ibu kita.

Part 2

We wanted to dine at Meatworks but semua fully booked.In the end, we went to the Curve's new Royal Bintang Hotel (the one with ice skating rink).Nik had dined there and said it's not too bad.I had sirloin steak (sedap giler), the rest had grilled salmon and lamb shanks.My mom had forgotten she had salmon before so she asked mana nasinya? :))

But she thoroughly enjoyed her salmon, rice or no rice.In the car I heard her laughing with Bibik over this: ya, mana saya biasa makan ikan sahaja...mcm kucing.

Nik and I pun tompang ketawa.Nik said one of his friends's dad masa first time mkn KFC pun didn't want to eat the chicken till the rice tiba.And the powers that be think all Malaysians are equal and shoud be thankful for the development they brought since Independence.

Happy birthday Z

Z turns 21 on May 11.

I still remember the trauma of childbirth.And the joy of seeing little Z. Sucking her thumb still.Congrats said the childless gynae and I heard her high heeled shoes clicking away. A thankless job round the clock but I'm sure the rewards are countless.

Z, happy 21st bday.May Allah continue to shower you with rahmah, mercy and all the good things in dunia and akhirat.

We love you mucho. 

Back at work

I did a presentation for the Kull today (Noraini had to ring me up to remind).Susahnya staff-less macam ni (there's only my intern at the office this morning).

So I had to sell myself at the presentation: our achievements since the inception of APC/CERDAS, our industrial ties, our social impact, money made, our fame (tak malu pun).Alhamdulillah Datuk Zuhdi is a reasonable Dean.He agreed to push for a permanent staff and I asked that my Coordinators are retained (whoever takes over CERDAS will need support).

Matin (my Canadian-Muslim friend who won first place in the IWFF script writing competition) gave me some ole-ole from Malacca (I think from Malacca).Their short film is currently being shot, I think. Zaki (of Jejak Rasul) wants to use CERDAS office for one of the scenes (nak tak pelakon tambahan? haha).

Sometimes rasa banyak sangat benda nak buat that you do not know where to begin!

Kena cadangkan cara lain pengundian

Ikuti pertukaran message saya dan teman saya di Columbus, Ohio Amerika Syarikat:

Evan:Is that a photo of a line of voters waiting to cast their ballots? If so, then it would seem that the entrenched powers in Malaysia have been studying the American art of voter suppression.

Me:No Evan.This is the post election rally/gathering to protest against election fraud (as claimed by the opposition party) Just google up Malaysian General Election news for further details

Evan:I'm glad to see people mobilized over the issue of fraud. When we exposed the genuine fraud in the 2004 election we scarcely mustered a few thousand people, nationally. And, now that John Kerry is our Secretary of State he has the gall, and the lack of a sense or irony, to demand that Venezuela conduct a full, nation-wide hand re-count of their paper ballots. He never asked for a recount in the U .S. - not even in Ohio. the Green Party had to demand (and pay for) that recount (which was meaningless, anyway, because in Kerry 's America all of the ballots are electronic and unverifiable. in Mexico, where there was also ample evidence of election fraud in the election prior to this most recent one, and Calderon took office before any recounts had been conducted Obrador supporters demonstrated in Mexico City -2 Million strong!  You may have misgivings (you, collectively, in Malaysia, I mean) about the effectiveness of demonstrating and demanding clean elections, but be grateful that you're not awash in ignorance and apathy as we are in the U.S.

Me:Perhaps we should be thinking hard of an alternative how we elect our leaders...the ballots do not seem to work or subject to abuse....worldwide.The Philippines will have theirs soon.That would be interesting to watch as well.

Evan:Venezuela has the best solution so far. When we were opposing the introduction of highly vulnerable and tamper-prone electronic voting systems in the U.S. we consulted with experts. I came up with an idea for a system wherein the electronic voting machines printed a paper ballot that the voter would verify in the presence of an election supervisor. Two experts told me that my idea was the "only" nearly fool-proof model that could work, but the prevailing wisdom at the time was to support an all-paper system with hand-counting. That was the second best option. Venezuela has a system in place that closely resembles my idea, and they have improved upon that by adding an automatic random audit requirement of more than 50% of their precincts. In Ohio our random audit is only 3% and it only consists of running the memory cartridges from the machines in 3%of the precincts through the same electronic tabulators once more. There are no checks against the tallies being altered at various points along the way as the electronic information from the tabulators travels, by wire, first to a Republican-owned company in Republican-owned Tennessee and then to the Secretary of State. Even the 3%audit is beatable if the machines themselves are programmed with an algorithm that commands them to display correct results for, say, the first 10% of the count, and, thereafter, to generate a fictitious tally favoring one particular candidate. I proposed that scenario to the owner and chief programmer of an election systems company that ran the voting in 1/3 of Ohio's counties and his face grew pale and he started to stutter. That's not "proof", of course, but it does cause one to wonder.

Me:Wough...I'll fwd this to some friends and see if we can propose this to our Election Commission which is parked under the Prime Minister's Office (don't laugh, please).

Evan:If you can find the Carter commission's report on the Venezuelan election system it spells it all out quite simply and clearly. Canada uses an all-paper hand-counted system that's nearly as good, but they accomplish that by having much smaller precincts and many more of them. Venezuela's system allows them to have U.S.-sized precincts, but to achieve the same accuracy and proficiency ad Canada.

A day after a battle was lost

I slept early on the evening of Election Day.Access to info of wins/losses was difficult.Some webs were down.Inconsistencies of reports, PR said most states tumbang, BN said it was winning big.Finally when an editor friend called to say Kedah tumbang, Kelantan hampir kalah, bla bla..I terus masuk tidur.

I woke up early thinking hari dah siang.Checked my fb and other online sources...ramai dah berkabung (which amused me a bit...I know it is frustrating...we had gone all out for a clean electoral system and we did experience irregularities...I saw how senior citizens were kept waiting dgn alasan yang pelbagai.Made noise and got someone to help this old Chinese couple to go in and vote early.Macam2lah). Then the irregularities of using pens/pencils...helped a few friends voting in Kedah and Perak to lodge a report with SPR and SUHAKAM ...ini semua tanggungjawab kita to pastikan integriti sistem pengundian kita tidak tercemar)

I am proud of the GE13 results.Kalah tapi menang.Hanya melalui satu kempen pilihanraya, rakyat pelbagai kaum bersatu menentang benda jahat...penipuan, rasuah, penyelewengan.Yg paling sweet, non Muslims menerima PAS dan mula berfikiran terbuka tentang hudud.Anak2 muda berkreatif di dalam Bahasa Melayu terutama anak-anak muda Cina.First time I dengar anak-anak muda India di Kelantan kecek Kelantan saying "Kito takdo masalah apo-apo..kito mace adik beradik kat sini..takdo kato kito ni India ke gapo."

Waaahhhh....

And while some friends could not hide their disappointments, others are more positive and encouraging, wanting to work harder for a better and just Malaysia.

I believe Allah will not abandon those who want to do good and it does not have to be from one party only.Yang penting nawaitu kita.

Undi anda tidak lagi rahsia

As friends and relatives berasap-asap kempen who not to vote, nyata undi masing-masing bukan lagi rahsia. I am quite surprised at how afraid some of us are of change. Usually it is those who are so pro ketuanan Melayu and so afraid that Islam in this country will be undermined should a new government is formed.Either that or mereka sudah byk 'termakan' budi dgn projek2 kerajaan dan kemudahan yang diberikan.

Nothing is free OK? We deserve better.Bukan tidak bersyukur but at the rate we are going...kita agak kebelakang compared to negara- negara lain.Don't compare with Bangladesh ke Mynmar ke. Compare dgn Spore, Japan, South Korea or Taiwan. Even OK to compare with Indonesia in many aspects.

And I don't understand this mindset..kalau kita berlainan undi, kita telah dikira berpecah belah dan diseru bersatu. Penat je belajar tinggi-tinggi if you think perbedaan pendapat is not Islamic.

Apapun, selamat mengundi dan semoga Allah selamatkan negara kita dan kita akan terus makmur dan aman.

Of tahlils and mournings

Tonight will be the final tahlil for Mama. Nik's siblings are coping well.Faisal and Lina would visit the grave sebelah siang. Some snippets of conversations with Nayli:

Me:Where is Wan?
Nayli: She's gone on a vacation under the sands.

Nayli:Where is Wan?
Nayli's mom: We have to put her in a box
Nayli: No!She cannot stay in a box!

By 3rd day:

Me:Where is Wan?
Nayli:Wan dalam kuh-bur.

By now, reality has sunked in.Even with Nayli.
Z was kept informed of all the happenings at home.Today she gets a bit more homesick than usual but our chats were still dominated by the election news.Lama2 bosan juga, yah?

Mama is no more, alfatihah

Nik called me at home saying Mama passed away at 6 pm semalam but when I saw him he said the doc thought mungkin Mama died dah sehari (but how do you explain the heart beat? Doctor ni...biar betul).

Faisal yg selalu jaga Ma was by her side but he also tak sedar when the heart totally stopped.Tengok2 dah zero.Nik was outside the ward.The rest pun.Gitulah kehendak Allah.I langsong tak berguna.Nak pi kedai bunga to buy some roses for the bunga rampai funeral pun I tak larat.So Bibik and I made do with whatever we had in the garden.

Then we memunggah my carpet for the tahlil.Nasib la my Bibik ni besar kuderatnya.Boleh angkat sorang (I helped halfway...if my mom knows..siap! She said d&c ni mcm org beranak juga..tak leh angkat berat, makan kena jaga)

Terasa Mama takda.
More later.Pagi ni sibuk with persiapan funeral.