Tuesday, June 03, 2014

A week today

I bersiap2 nak drop by kerja sebelum nak ke HUKM this time last week.I thought since my other siblings dah ada nunggu my mom, bolehlah I curi masa sikit menghabiskan whatever kerja I could.

Then Sal (who was supposed to go to Kuala Selangor to interview parents and students yg nak masuk special schools tu) rang to say my mom was getting worse.The docs advised everyone to be there.

I dropped everything and drove to HUKM, knowing my mom would not leave without me being there (cos' I yakin kasihsayang Allah).Dalam pada itu,I bimbang juga setiap dering phone akan membawa berita yang ditakuti.I mean I'm not wali to foresee the future, kan.

The ICU ward was open to all...the guard and nurses kasi je brp orang nak masuk.Bagusnya mrk ni.The ketua doc in charge was Sob's friend.The day before she took us all to a special room and briefed us what was happening to my mom then said she needed a decision of treatment they could proceed if my mom kena heart attack (karan).We weighed the pros and cons.Sob and Ummi yg doctors-nya refused to advise us saying their medical bground would give a biased decision...the children must decide.I asked for more time.The doc in charge (pakar) said she understood.Mek dah emo.She was against tne karan treatment saying my mom was already too frail.Also the fact it would not make any difference (cos' ubat yg patut masuk after karan docs could not use sbb lagi bahaya to the other organs). Mek was crying and left the room.The rest decided to go for it (ditambah kukuh dgn fatwa Mizi who did syariah at Uni Madinah and ustaz.He cited some fiqh evidence..keluar hadis mana yg patut bila berdepan with this..he said selagi ada ikhtiar to go for it).

But this day last week, we all woke up changing our minds..kami bertujuh beradik sepakat not to karan my mom if she had another attack cos' no point...she's too frail and her bp was dropping by the min.We told the doc.Then baru Ummi ckp it was the right decision.I wish Sob and her had been more courageous and said so earlier.Tapi iyalah...knowing us, nanti mula tuduh itu ini should my mom mati after the karan atas advice mrk.Syukur my mom didnt have a heart attack.I was praying hard that it would not happen.She was too frail.

I had early dinner with Lina at Bangsar Shopping Centre semalam (Lina is one of my closest friends).She just got back from her vacation in Iran and had stuffs I kirim.We started talking about my mom pre and post death.It's a reminder for yg hidup utk mencari husnul khotimah dan making sure we live right and diredhoi Allah.

11.24 am: I met IIUM mosque's imam who did solat hajat for my mom last Monday.Namanya Shahrul.Bersih muka dia.He said ada 3 saf yang buat solat tu and he's happy to know my mom left gently.Kalau sapa-sapa nak bersedekah kasi makan asnaf (pelajar dan musafir di UIA) Ramadan ni, satu malam lebihkurang RM4K- RM6K (lebih takpa).Tolong war-warkan ya.Rezeki tak pernah berkurang apabila kita bersedekah malah Allah lindungi kita dari mala petaka.Investment akhirat.

 My guess: this pic was taken in the late 60s (1967 or 1968.I looked like I was 4 or 5).
That's me on the left looking sulky as ever and my mom second on 
the left.The rest must be her friends or relatives.
That could be Sal being carried by someone.

My parents (maybe early 70s ni).Bahagialah mereka di alam barzakh now.



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